As i lead there letting tears roll down my face staining the pillow beneath me "what the hell is wrong with me?! why would i touch him like that hes overstimulated enough as it is i've probably made it worse!" i think to myself, i know how i feel might be a bit over the top but i just love him so much he's my best friend i don't want him to hate me.
a small glint catches my teary eyes from the corner of my room... my blade box, it's open... "no!" i think to myself "i've been clean for two years i-i can't" i mumble but then i hear jake slam the front door making me flinch "i fucked up" i said to myself then grapping the box making my way to the bathroom.
(jakes pov) i went to 711 to get monster and gummy worms grapping to monsters one for me and one for johnnie. i have no idea why he ran upstairs tho.
(johnnies pov) i open the box to see many blades i sigh taking one out looking at it shine, i took it and put it under the freezing cold water making sure it was clean (unlike me) i put the blade cold blade to my skin making a little cut then a sigh comes from my mouth then the tiny cut becomes big and quick slashes. after abit both of my wists were covered in blood i washed the cuts off making me hiss at the pain just as i was about to walk out i hear the front door open and i hear a "johnnie come downstairs ive got soomething for you" it was jake.shit.Shit.SHIT i said to myself i didnt have a long sleeve on "johnnieeeee" i hear jake walking up the stairs "j-jake just g-g-go downstairs i-ill be down now" i said stuttering "johnnie are you ok you seem off let me in pls" jake said knocking on the door wiggleing the door handle i sigh opening the door hideing both of my hands behind my back "johnnie whats behind your back?" jake asked trying to look "jake its nothing can i go to my room to change?" i asked trying to go past him "not intill you show me whats in your hands" jake sounded worried "come to my room ill show you" i sighed knowing what was goiing to happen "so what is it?" jake asked " i-i um w-w-well" i stuttered badly "johnnie just show me" jake said grapping both of my arms looking down at them "i-i-im so f-fucking s-s-sorry jake"
SORRY OTHER CLIFF HANGER
AND OH MY FUCKING GOD 62 READS?!!? IM LOSING IT THANK U ALL SO MUCH
ily guys sm be strong and dont give up on anything what ever your doing rn im so proud of u for doing it be safe i love u guys sm<3
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