Conkeldurr gets drunk and fights Dream

high off that ZA

arguably the worst thing yall will ever read on here

please note this is satire but I still hate dream nothing will make me not hate him 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

also this isn't making fun of the dream vs gumball thing where gumballs VA was under the influence this is something completely unrelated I would never parody that

gay gay homosex

It was a really awesome Friday night, Conkeldurr, the Pokémon that looks like an old wrinkly penis, is bored and wants to get a drink or something, But his ugly ass is carrying around two whole ass fucking concrete brick things you could say he's mega bricked UP and has to put them down in order to do anything. "Damn these things kinda suck I'm getting rid of them" Said Conkeldurr before throwing his concrete brick things full force into ongoing traffic and causing a massive fucking explosion. He then begins to walk towards the local bar, on his way to the BANGER bar he sees his one and only true best friend, Zapdos. They are really gay for each other but don't realize it cause zapdos is home of phobic and Conkeldurr doesn't know what liking men is because Zapdos is genderless according to the pokemon data base FUCK YOU ITS A MALE HES GOT A DONG!!!!!!!!!++!!!!!!++++!!!! (this is so fucking stupid) "Hey Zapdos how's life going" Conkeldurr said when walking by zapdos, who looked high off his shit, "Life is craaazzyyy.......where u headingd" He responded, before falling face first onto the ground and then flying away frantically like a fucking maniac. "Damn you could've just said you didn't wanna talk whyd you fly away bbg" Conkeldurr said before walking away like those fuckass cartoons when they get sad, with that sad spongebob song playing in the background cause bro got taht outro music

why

Conkeldurr gets to the local bar and the bar happens to be the most awesome and famous bar ever, Moe's Tavern. He enters the bar and sees that a lot of people are here, including Rayquaza and his fuckass rival alien thing, Deoxys, Conkeldurr is scared of them so he immediately ran to a seat that was the closest to the exit before something crazy happens only to fall out of the fucking seat like a fucking dumbass and make the loudest thud the world as ever heard like a kid falling out of his chair in the middle of a math exam and making a literal earthquake out of it holy shit it was so loud. Conkeldurr quickly got back onto his seat and looked at Moe, with a fuckass grin on his face. But Moe was not amused "tell me what you want you wrinkly dick looking ahh" Moe said angrily, Conkeldurr gets a wack ass frown on his face. "Don't bully me I just got here" He responded, before answering with what he wants, "give me your strongest thing idc how strong it is its just to feel something" Conkeldurr said sounding like an edgy 13 year old who broke up with their fortnite girlfriend. Moe nods and serves Conkeldurr the strongest thing avaliable, shit looked like neon green battery acid mixed with fiber glass but Conkeldurr downed that shit like no tomorrow, before asking for just 1 beer. Moe sighed angrily again and served him the beer before walking away cause his old ass had to do something. Conkeldurr was feeling it now Mr. Krabs, bro was feeling like he was floating, he was having a great time fr. Until Dream looking like Bob from Friday night fucking walked kn the bar, making everyone look at him and pointing out his fuckass jawline built like Rumpelstiltskin. He walked in without a word and sat down next to Conkeldurr, who was not happy about him entering.

"Ay get your ugly ass outta here you groom miners" Conkeldurr said turning to dream, who did not care. "Nuh uh" He responded, not caring about what Conkeldurr has to say or something. Conkeldurr gets angry and stands up "at least I care about kids and not a minecraft youtuber, cause you've completed the minecraft YouTuber speedrun, make channel, post videos, get dedicated audience, get 1million subs, AND GROOM MINERS" Conkeldurr shouted at dream, dream was flabbergasted, "WHO TOLD YOU MY TOP SECRET YET REALLY OBVIOUS PLAN??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!???" Dream shouted, Conkeldurr points to the man in the back of the bar, the man was Verbalase. "What's up guys it's verbalase the beat boxer from outer space, I'm a certified gooner but at least I didn't harm a child despite spending 50k racks on an animation where I don't even get laid" He said while beatboxing, the intensity of this situation make Deoxys fall out of his seat and onto the floor, drunk out of his ass. Making the whole bar silent for a second, before returning to the madness. "WHAT HE DID WAS WORSE THAN ME!!" dream said in a panic, but Conkeldurr does not care, so he began to beat the shit out of dream, Buzzwole came in with his beautiful I mean UGLY wife Pheromosa and were stunned at the sight "Holy shit Conkeldurr is beating bobs ass" Buzzwole commented. Pheromosa was also interested in the fight and joined in, kicking the living shit out of dream, buzzwole was stunned that his gorgeous wife was being so evil, but he joined her immediately and started beating the fuck out of dream. Now that 3 very strong Pokémon were beating dreams ass, his true form was revealed, dream was a fucking minecraft block. Everyone was stunned. "DAAMMNNNNN" Verbalase said in the back, Conkeldurr was unhappy and destroyed the block with his fist. Killing dream and ending his reign. "That wasn't dream, that was nightmare." Pheromosa said, looking at buzzwole, who was flexing his fuckass muscles again EWW BUFF TICK TOCK HEAVY LIKE A BRINKS TRUCK BUG 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔. "that was more than a nightmare that was sleep paralysis." Buzzwole said, turning around and seeing Verbalase. "And you, you fucking gooner. 50k was not worth althat." Buzzwole scolded Verbalase because funny. Verbalase didn't respond and started doing funny Thanos beat box.

why 2x

Conkeldurr, Pheromosa and Buzzwole began enjoying some drinks together, because epic gamer. Moe comes back and is shocked over the scene. His bar was almost destroyed, verbalase was doing fuckass stand up comedy on a table and Rayquaza is dead for some fucking reason, maybe he's actually passed out cause alcohol ain't fun. "Holy shit what happened here" Moe said, looking flabbergasted. Buzzwole turned and looked at Moe, getting up out of his seat and giving Moe 50k. "Thank you for your services sir, I'll repair the damage done to this fuckass place. and don't spend all those racks on an animation where you don't even get laid dawg" Buzzwole said before giving Moe a big thumbs up. Moe was startled but thanked Buzzwole for his kindness or something. Buff mosquito being nice is something that shouldn't exist.

After a while, buzzwole repaired all the damaged done to the bar and they left, paying for everything. Conkeldurr was drunk off his shit and was falling everywhere, Buzzwole and Pheromosa did not know what to do with him, so they got zapdos to deal with him. Zapdos arrived in a flash for some damn reason and shouted "YOU KNOW ITS 2AM RIGHT??!" They nod and immediately fade into nothingness. Zapdos was confused out of his mind and fucking exploded, Verbalase comes out and sees Conkeldurr. "Holy shit you are fucked up bro you good?" He asked, Conkeldurr did not respond but instead fucking fell over and fell asleep immediately. Verbalase did not comment and just walked the other direction.

Conkeldurr will return........