Suggestion: play breathe me by sia while reading this to catch more feels.
This chapter is kinda sad and this or the next chapter will probably be the last one. Perhaps I'll make a sequel but who knows love you all -syd♡ //IMPORTANT A/N AT THE END BTW//
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¡!PS TRIGGER WARNING!¡
-SAMMY'S POV
*one week later*
"Sammy, I, I need to talk to you." Trevor sighed as he walked into my room. "What's up Trev?" I asked cuddling up to him. "This. I-I can't" he said. Tears welled up in his eyes. "Trevor. What's wrong?" I asked seriously, pushing away from him. "Samantha. I-I think I think I'm uh....I think I'm gay." He said with a sigh.
I laughed. "Trevor that's, that's crazy!" He looked at the floor. "You love me and I'm a girl!" I exclaimed. "Samantha I just, I don't have feelings for you anymore. I loved you. I just can't find myself to be attracted to females lately. It might just be a phase but let's be real." He laughed. "So are you- are we breaking up?" I choked out. "I, I guess so, yeah." He sighed and I felt the tears begin to sting my eyes. "Get out." I growled. "Wha-what?" He asked, his voice coated in pain.
"GET OUT!" I screamed. And I felt as if time had suddenly slowed. I pushed Trevor out of my room and shut the door behind me, running to grab my phone. The tears slowly slid down my face as I pressed the record button.
"Hey guys." I sniffled. "So uhm lately life just hasn't been going that great" I chuckled, wiping my now red nose. "And I just - I don't think I can do much of this anymore." I sighed. "So uhm this is my final video, I guess." I smiled. "I love each and every one of you. And for one final time, bye guys. It's Samantha signing off for her final video..." I trailed, stopping the video. I put it on YouTube as soon as I finished and titled it "My final goodbye." I wandered into my bathroom and looked in the mirror one last time.
I grabbed a notebook and wrote each of the boys a little note.
Connor,
You were my sanity and my world; you kept me going when no one else would. I couldn't even have began to imagine what my life would've been without you. Please, please, PLEASE stay you and don't let anyone change you because the you you are is beautiful and perfect just the way it is. I love you more than life itself. See you on the other side -Your little ball of sunshine, Samantha.
Jc,
We weren't as close as I was with the other boys but I still loved and cared about you. Stay cloudy my friend. Lots of Love -Your big cloud, Samantha.
Sam,
My little rose. Yeah we didn't talk that often but I love and care about you as equally as I do the other boys. Stay beautiful. -Your little daisy, Sammy.
KiKi,
My big Kiwi! You were like the twin brother I never had. You and I had a bond that no one else could amount to. I love you so freakin much. See you on the other side -Sammypatch kid.Ricky,
I'm sorry. I failed you. I promised you I'd stay strong but I just couldn't anymore. I love you more than I love myself and I failed you. I tried so long and so hard to stay strong Ricky. I promise you I did but I just can't hold up anymore. I guess it was all too much to handle. Trying to be the best I can at everything when in reality there's nothing I'm good at. I'll never be as good of a singer as Trevor, I'll never be as successful as any of you boys but you have to promise both me and yourself that you're going to stay strong and carry on without me because I'm nothing to be upset over. I'm worthless and useless. Stay strong and keep doing what you're doing. I love you so much. -Your little sis, Sammy.