Within Temptation

Twelve (Paranoid)

I had achieved the lowest of the low.

My brilliant plan of saying the first thing that came to mind placed me on the fast track to Hell literally. Ben had left and not even fifteen minutes later I called in the devil and brought him to my doorstep. I feel disappointed in myself for not having the strength to fight him off. I worked on my mental barriers until I was blue in the face. The shame, it was real and it was hitting me smack dab in the feels. I was right back to square one only this time I had a timer.

It had taken eight days of constant exposure for me to become a Succubus. I didn't know if my answer under the influence warranted the full supernatural welcome package. What I did know was that I had to stop this now. I couldn't do that while being controlled like a puppet on a string. I wake up to every part of me feeling sore leading me to wonder what I had done. My memories were hazy at best.

I move slowly feeling like an old lady at the age of twenty-five. I grab my clothes and head for the bathroom. I turn the shower to hellfire-level temperature to get myself wide awake. I can't hear Orion or the dogs. This worried me because Ben wasn't home. Did Andy stay the night? My heart panics, not liking the idea of him being around my son. With my memories back I am fully aware of what he's capable of. I shower and change into my signature jeans, t-shirt, and flannel. My hair goes up into a bun my bangs going rogue to frame my face. With my teeth brushed and a final checkover for marks and strange tattoos I make my way into the kitchen.

"Mma!"

My eyes widen at the sight of Orion in his high chair. Andy, bless his heart, is attempting to feed him cereal. Orion looks upset and I'll be honest I'm right there with him. I haven't heard anything from Ben. I'm still not convinced of the business trip excuse.

"Good morning, beautiful." Andy smiles.

My body craves to walk right into his arms. I force myself to remain where I am. I'm putting my foot down. It's time for me to show I'm a lot tougher than I look. His eyes darken I can feel him pulling the strings. I shake my head crossing my arms over my chest. Orion goes quiet his eyes wide.

"Anny ig ouble." He says. Translation: Andy is in big trouble.

"You've had your fun, I'd like the reins back please, and thank you." My voice is freezing cold.

"I should have known, you've always been formidable, and I do love a challenge." His eyes flash black.

I sigh in relief feeling the snap of the invisible strings. I give him what I hope is a thankful smile. If I conveyed my true feelings he'd be bleeding out on the floor. Andy's eyebrow raises in confusion. I would take the satisfaction in knowing I'd block him from reading my mind. Perhaps I'd have a fighting chance this time. I cross the room taking the bowl of cereal into my hands. Orion begins to eat eyeing Andy uneasily. He may enjoy his uncle, but not when he knows something is up."

"Addy?" He asks me.

"He's on a trip baby," I answer. "We'll visit Aunt Yumi today."

"Ork?" He says around a mouthful of food. I give him a look that says no talking with your mouth full.

"Mama is taking some time off sweetheart. No work for me." I kiss his forehead.

"Rin, we need to talk."

"No Andrew, we do not need to do anything. I told you multiple times we can't do this!" I put up my hand. "I am married to someone I love and cherish more than anything. I have a son, Andrew. He needs his mother and I have no intent of orphaning him at a young age."

"So, you're willing to live with the agonizing pain that follows the withdrawals." His voice chills me to my core.

"I am, I made my choice Andrew. It's Ben, it will always be Ben."