once more to see you, LOTTIE M.

𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗟𝗢𝗚𝗨𝗘: where'd all the time go?

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THE heat was unbearable, especially since the girls were running. it was a thursday and the yellowjackets varsity soccer team was playing against some other school in this heat. they were winning of course, having a streak of 3 games won so far.

lottie matthews and y/n l/n sat on the bench together, watching the game unfold from afar. lottie sipped on some of her water as y/n tied up her cleats, managing to pay attention to two things at once. it was surprisingly awkward between the two, considering the scenery and their history.

lottie and y/n's history wasn't anything new, y/n moved to new jersey in freshman year, got on the soccer team and (in lottie's words) has been unfortunate enough to always be on a team with her. y/n though, had no complete opinion on the other. in fact, (in her words) she could care less. despite their opinions, they've always been prone to bickering with eachother. from not passing the ball to stepping on the other's shoe, it always seemed to end with them being upset with eachother.

so, instead of exhausting each other with the constant aggression, they've learned to avoid eachother. maybe not physically, but definitely mentally; blocking eachother out of existence for however long they needed to.

but in this instance, y/n made the confident decision of sitting next to lottie. both of them were too invested in the game to really pay attention to the other.

that was until the brunette spoke up, "allie's not so bad for a freshman." she shrugged, easily catching y/n's attention. "what?" she said, looking at lottie in some sort of disbelief.

lottie already looked annoyed despite trying not to. she looked at y/n, "i said allie doesn't suck that badly." she said louder, but not too loud: just in case anyone was around, especially allie.

y/n eased up to lottie's want for conversation, nodding before she looked back at the field. "yeah, she's not that bad." she shrugged, the sun blinding her eyes.

it was an odd feeling, a feeling lottie didn't like to be left with. she could feel herself pouting as y/n kept watching the game. she felt unfulfilled and even disappointed. "how was your day?!" she blurted out, instantly regretting it. y/n looked back at her, "since when do you give a shit about my day?" she chuckled. lottie rolled her eyes, "can you just answer the damn question?" she asked.

y/n nodded, "whatever. my day was good. how was yours?" she asked kindly. lottie shrugged, "same old. this is like—the only highlight of my day."

"really?" y/n giggled. lottie nodded, "really."

"well, im glad you have a highlight of your day, at least." she smiled and lottie actually found herself smiling back.

"thanks."

...

charles darwin once said "it is not the strongest of species that survives, not the most intelligent that survives. it is the one that is the most adaptable to change." and not once did y/n think she would be the embodiment of that quote.

though she didn't know it yet, deep down everyone else did. at least the ones paying attention to her did.

it's been a week since the plane to nationals had crashed, and it has been 2 days since the remaining group had found the lake and the cabin.  throughout their time of struggle, y/n seemed like the only one with their sanity intact: the cabin making her more comfortable.

it was summer, obviously, and there was a lack of showers, so y/n mostly spent her mornings and evenings swimming or bathing. then if she was bored, there were some interesting books on the shelves. then of course, she could go on a hike with her cassette player, listening to her favorite bands.

she was set, and a couple portion of the group was annoyed at the fact. y/n didn't mind though, managing to bring some comfort to team captain, jackie taylor. jackie had easily befriended the girl from the start, their relationship blooming on the hike to the lake. they made easy conversation, joking around and even talking about the homework that was due precrash.

lottie watched as jackie and y/n walked off to fetch some water, probably going to gossip or talk about god knows what. she was jealous and she knew it. how come y/n was doing so well? why isn't y/n struggling?

it was infuriating, and it definitely wasn't fair.

"is anyone else annoyed with how y/n just lives normally?" she asked, looking at taissa walk by as she sat on the porch. "it's fucking freaky."

"she's just trying to make herself feel better, lott." tai said, walking up to van. van gave tai a look as she sat down next to her, almost as if she was telepathically greeting her. the redhead turned her attention to lottie, "i think it's sweet. makes life seem somewhat normal." she sighed, making "art" in the dirt with a stick.

lottie sighed, looking away from the two. she brought her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them as well. it's been a day since lottie had found the skeleton in the attic, and it's been a couple hours since lottie's last night terror that seem so realistic she could cry. so much was going wrong for her, and y/n's presence was just like an unfair taunt that it'll never get better.