He keeps finding me

1.24

"If you- if you didn't offer him that job in the first place, he would not be lying here. If you-" The next sentence was drowned in a sob.
Noah felt like he was there, but not really. He felt hollow and so so guilty, that he could only look at Ben who was holding Zenix in his arm. Crying into his shoulder as he hugged him tightly. Noah felt utterly helpless. Mills walked in and saw the scene before them, Ben was hugging a lifeless body and Noah sat there looking at them both. The whole lab was turned over, tables laid everywhere upturned, some even broken. And the zombie was nothing but charcoal. They walked out again to get someone. A few minutes later about four people in black fight suits came in together with Mr. Murray.
The old man sighed at the tragedy, walked to Ben, and put a hand on his shoulder, "I once was exactly where you are, the war many years ago took my best friend too. He died in my arms, never opening his eyes again. His last wish was to take care of his little sister for him." The old man's eyes were deep in thought the loss still weighing as heavy as it hurt many years ago.

Ben raised his head to look at Mr. Murray, "I don't have anyone anymore, he was the last one. How will I be able to live without him? How will I be able to live all alone?"
"You will never learn to truly live without any of the people you care about. You will always be reminded, but that doesn't mean it has to be bad. Remember the good things, remember him in a way that he is still alive. When not in the world you live in, then he should live one in here," with that, Mr. Murray raised his hand to his heart. Ben looked at the hand that was raised over Mr. Murray's heart.
"I don't want him to be touched by anyone other than me, if he really has to be incinerated then I want to be the one who carries him there," Ben demanded, slowly standing up with Zenix's Body in his arms. Noah watched as Ben carried Zenix out of the lab, he slowly tried to get up. Standing, his legs felt wobbly, and every step he took made him hear voices.
Well, more like one voice, 'You're just like your father.' His mother's voice, repeating over and over again. He couldn't even hear Mr. Murray as he tried to talk to him. 

His head was full, so full, 'You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You're a murderer. You're just like your father. You're at fault. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You murdered someone. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You're a killer. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You hurt someone. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. You're just like your father. HE IS DEAD, because of YOU'
Noah was going crazy, "STOP, get out of my head! I wasn't... My body couldn't move. I didn't want him to die." As the people in black tried to restrain him he punched and kicked around, until he was put to sleep. Everything faded to black.

...

Every step felt heavy as Ben walked further and further. He knew the protocol, that if a corpse had been bitten before dying he had to be incinerated immediately. To burn Zenix, he couldn't, but to let him go without seeing him off, would be a thousand times worse. He will be with him, every step of the way. Ben also knew he couldn't stay, the hate that had built up for Noah, the research, and this whole base had reached its limit when Zenix died. The incinerator was on the first floor, behind the garden of the dojo. It was hard walking through the masses of people, with a body in your arms, a body that had been alive just a few moments ago. The incinerator was like a clay firing station with two doors. In front of the incinerator, he laid Zenix down and kissed his forehead, silently promising that they would meet in their next life. Ben watched Zenix as the flames enclosed the body more and more until the door was shut and Zenix's ashes would forever be mixed with other people in there. He fell on his knees, his head fell to his chest and he prayed. Ben was never the type to pray, but he did so the soul of his friend would find their way to salvation.