Winter Emptiness

Chapter 8: pain and sorrow

October year 26:
Another thing in our living is that people are ungrateful due to their selfish behavior, sometimes I wonder if my child is satisfied enough, I don't want him to be ungrateful or spoiled but I want him to depend by his own cause he is a man, a true man who will contribute to society. I truly love him and I care a lot about him, I m waiting for him to grow up and have his first love, I want him to be some knowledge lover not some porn addict or hoe seeker. I don't want him to be an optimistic jerk thinking life is perfection , while reality is the opposite it can't be perfect, I want him to be logical or realistic for his sake, I want him to depend on his thinking more than intuition.

I m truly grateful to have him in my living especially with my husband by my side.

Speaking of husband one night I went to do shopping with them, we entered a dress shop , as someone who dress really formal I barely wear dresses, he suddenly pointed a purple dress and said I would look good on it, I didn't know how to respond and he begged me to try it so I did full of embarrassment, as I went out of the dressing room my husband and son were shocked , at the point my son said "when I get older I will marry a woman like mom" and my darling gave him a weird side eye and started laughing,

"I will buy you this"

"but I never asked and what purpose"

"you never wore a dress and looking feminine is fitting you"

I blushed for his straightforward reaction, he bought me that dress and we left the store until they both entered a suit store, I joined them and they choosed a blue suit for the son and a white one for him , I didn't know what to say they were so good looking. After we quitted the mall we went to the car, as my husband was riding .

"Ok guys we are going to have a family date tomorrow in a fancy restaurant"

"Bullshit that's a waste of money"

"You are not the one paying so shut up"

"whatever you want"

He then smiled at me and took my hand "are you mad" , "why in the hell I have to shut up while I one gave my opinion you could talk more respectfully" "I m sorry I just want to please you, after all you are an accountant and you are faced to this" "but not with my husband" "you are right", our son was scared and he started getting more worried but I patted him.

November year 26:

The day came and I prepared myself at the fullest , we went on the car and we arrived at the place, it was so giant and I wondered the price of the menu , before we entered my husband whispered "don't mind the prices you are not one paying" but I couldn't , when we sat a waiter came to us and we ordered, it was so expensive and I tried to order the cheapest meal

"I knew you would do it can you please be selfish for once, why are you trying to raise your son to be selfish while you can't be one"

"I just can't"

"That's alright now you will order the most expensive thing in the menu"

Why was he acting like that, I was raised not to be spoiled and now he is the one doing it, I can't understand him.

Our order came and shit , the meal was so delicious, he smiled at me "what do you think" I cried of emotions "thank you so much" , I saw my son manners which wasn't excepted "where did you learn this" "values" he said with a respectful tone, I haven't expect this philosophical answer from him.

As we were done, my husband told our son to stay in the table waiting while he took my hand, I followed him confused and we entered a balcony , there was an excellent view of nature , a full white moon surrounded by clouds. He then looked at me as I was speechless ,it was an awkward silent.