My best friends stepmother.

chapter 32

Thursday, 27 July

It's been three months since my bride price got paid, Kgotso and I are as happy as we could ever be.

This sotho man really stole my heart and i fall for him more with each day that goes by.

08:50

Here we are in out beautiful bedroom, I'm in my silk pajamas and he's just wearing pajama pants. I'm scrolling on socials while he is doing some work on his laptop.

Anyway, he closes his laptop and looks at me. No, stares at me.

Kgotso: I love you.
Me: yeah right.
Kgotso: I really do.

He holds my hand and takes a deep breath.

Kgotso: I've loved you ever since I first saw you.
Me: in your living room, eating take-out with your daughter?
Kgotso: you were drooling over me.
Me: you are so...

He interrupts me.

Kgotso: what? sexy?
Me: uhm, no, old man.
Kgotso: ouch, that hurt.

I laugh because he is so dramatic.

Me: I'm joking, I love you, baby.

We look at each other and kiss. A kiss so magical, we get lost in the moment. Everything else disappears and my mind goes into space, totally amazed by this magnificent kiss that has blessed my lips.

I snap out of it and push him off.

Me: no.
Kgotso: okay, let's go make breakfast.
Me: okay.

We head downstairs and he starts making the eggs while i hug him from behind.

Before me, stands my home, my hope, my love, the one that will never get away.

The smell of the eggs triggers a feeling of nausea so I run up to our bedroom, go into the bathroom and let it all out. Before I know it, Kgotso is behind me, patting my back, with a bottle of water in his other hand.

Kgotso: when last did you get your period?
Me: a month and two weeks ago.
Kgotso: it's very late.
Me: what do you...

I stop as I think about it. Am I? But I doubt it.

Friday, 28 July

Kgotso and I are on the way to the pharmacy to get pregnancy tests and he keeps making small talk.

Kgotso: so how were your exams?
Me: they were fine.
Kgotso: did you pass?
Me: I believe so.
Kgotso: but like, do you think...

I interrupt him as I feel my patience run very thin.

Me: Kgotso, can we please just keep quiet? please, my love?
Kgotso: okay.

He continues to drive and I look outside the window. Eventually, I just pull out my airpods, connect them to my phone and listen to music.

We get to the pharmacy and we, or rather I get the pregnancy tests while Kgotso is on the phone with his business partner. This man is always busy, I have accepted that.

We get to the car and the ride home is the same as the ride to the clinic, silent. We get home and run upstairs, where I take four pregnancy tests and we wait but not in peace because...

Kgotso: so what's the way forward if you really are pregnant?
Me: what do you mean? eh mona, we are married, we raise the child.
Kgotso: no, that's not what I mean. I don't think we've truly healed from the loss of our first baby, I need us to heal.
Me: I understand. I agree with you, we need to heal. I guess we'll have to go to therapy but let's wait for the results?
Kgotso: okay.
Me: I love you.
Kgotso: I love you.

We kiss for a good minute but we return to reality as we remember that I might be pregnant so I grab the tests and they are all positive. Tears fall down my face, effortlessly and I start sobbing painfully, Kgotso cries too but silently.

He picks me up and lays me down on the bed. He grab a checkered throw over and covers me, before cuddling me. I cry in his arms, until I have hiccups.

Kgotso: I'm here every step of the way, mommy. I love you.
Me: thank you.

He kisses me and we go back to cuddles. The warmth that I'm feeling in his arms, melting the sorrows away. And for a moment, they cease to exist. That is the love of my moshoeshoe.