the invisible string. Sihtric Kjartanson

Chapter twelve: the wedding

Two days after we had returned from Mercia I was to be wed. The priest from Lundene who Uthred had saved was to hold the ceremony. He was apparently an old friend of his. I did not had Father Pyrlig, he had a cheerful character and was ever so honest besides the fact that his laughter was incredible contagious. Uthred stayed adamant to keep me from knowing who my husband was to be. Gisela borrowed me a gorgeous light green dress that had flowers embroidered on the bottom. That fit to the spring weather very well. She also put a green scarf which was translucent over my head like a veil. She also braided my hair beautifully on the top and let the curly bottom fall down to my waist. I was still a free woman for now. After I was wed I would have to wear my hair up. My nerves were getting to me. I was more nervous than before any battle.

"What if he's whiny? Or ugly? Or both?" I cried to Gisela as she picked flowers for my hair. She quickly hugged me. I rarely ever cried but that day I just felt helpless and overwhelmed.

"You'll be fine. I made sure that the two of you are perfect for each other.  Even if you don't like him right away you don't have to spend a lot of time together. You consummate your marriage tonight and then you can go your separate ways and you're safe from any other men" She whispered in my ear but I was still crying.

"But what if I want to love but this man will keep me from it?" I never thought of these things before but now they sudden sprung into my head. Gisela wiped my tears but they kept falling. She put the flowers in my hair. I must look so beautiful.

"It is time" Finan said as he appeared and I was hopeful for a moment that he'd be my husband but then I realised he had just been sent to fetch us. "Oh darling you will be alright" He also plopped down on the meadow and sat next to me to hug me. "You look gorgeous Kendra, like an angel truly. You'll be fine" He kissed the top of my head and hugged me again. "No more crying.  We gotta get going" Finan said softly yet sternly as he offered me a hand to pull me up. I was still quietly sobbing but calmed when we got to the river where the ceremony was taking place. I wished not to marry in the church as it was little better than the stables even if it was still a place of worship. Under the pure sky god could watch the whole procession and judge it. Finan let go of my hand and motioned for me to continue walking. There were few people watching the procession, only the ones I knew closely. I did not try to spy at my husband but only looked to the floor to make sure I wouldn't trip.  I stopped next to a pair of clean leather boots and Father Pyrligs ropes. I turned to my husband for him to lift the makeshift veil and reveal his bride. My heart dropped when I realised who stood before me. Tears breached my eyes again when I looked at Sihtric. He seemed surprised then had a look of hateful wrath in his eyes that I wanted to take a step back but I couldn't. He must've been expecting Eahlswith. I was just another disappointment for him. My eyes found his jaw which was clenched so hard it must've hurt. Pyrlig soon interrupted my thoughts as he started the procession. He spoke a prayer and blessed us. Sihtric didn't pray. Of course not he was a pagan bastard. I hated him more than ever. Now I was bound to him forever or at least until death did us apart. I might do the honours of death. I wanted to cry but he couldn't see my weakness, I had been so weak for him before. Father Pyrlig slowly placed our hands together and put the string around it to symbolise the marital bound. He declared us husband and wife. I gave one weak sob before catching myself again. A lone tear rolled down my cheek. I flinched when Sihtrics hand came up to wipe it away but there was hate in his touch.

We went inside the hall to the feast Gisela had made sure to prepare. I wanted a break to cry and scream but I wasn't so lucky because we were placed at the head of the table for everyone to watch the happy couple. In my head I was screaming, crying, throwing up while I retained a neutral face outside. I did not want the feast to end because that meant that he had officially the right to fuck me against my will like his father did years ago. A wave of fear shook me. We both tried to sit and drink until dawn to get out of the consummation. I barely drank anything because I couldn't stomach it and Sihtric seemed similar because his cup sat in front of him untouched to.