𝐌𝐚𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞

43| Confession 🌶️

Pehle Bhi Main Tumse Mila Hoon
Pehli Dafa Hi Milke Laga
Toone Chhua Zakhmon Ko Mere
Marham Marham Dil Pe Laga

Esha's POV:-

" It's cold here , isn't it ? " He grabbed my hands and filled my hands with kisses .

We both are sitting in the ground . The fire is burning in front and we both have been talking while looking into each other's eyes and sitting in each other's arms for the last 30 minutes.
Yes, it is cold but because of the fire in front, we are not feeling the cold that much.

" Avin ? " I sweetly asked him . My head was resting on his shoulder .

" Hmm ? " His fingers ran through my hairs lightly .

" If I ask you one thing, you won't mind, right ? " I asked him with a scary tone .

" Why would I mind ? Whatever you say to me, I will silently listen everything . " He spoke with a smile .

" Umm well , I wanted to ask you about your feelings " my voice shook a little .

" What feelings ? " He asked back .

" Did you love your mom so much ? " I finally asked .

I know whatever happened to him in his childhood was probably unbearable for him. But whatever. I am with him. Whether someone holds his hand or not, I will hold it and keep him happy throughout my life. He means everything to me.

As soon as he heard my question he cleared his throat and looked another side holding my hand tightly .

" Avin , I am sorry I didn't mean to . If you don't feel like talking about it, leave it. I will not force you . " I cupped his jaw and made him look at me . His eyes were filled with moisture .

" It's ok . Let me tell you . " He sighed deeply looking at the stars .

" I was 11 years old . It was Rivan's 8 years birthday . Everyone was really very happy . Everyone was enjoying . I did not have many friends since childhood. I preferred to be alone. Rivan cut the cake. And he was enjoying a lot with his friends. Our house was very well decorated. Well, I didn't have many friends so I thought I'd go to my room. But as soon as I went there, an uncle called me from behind. He told me to go and call my mum . I still remember that I was the tallest among all the children present there and I was wearing a black colored kurta with my favorite black watch. I was looking so handsome and perfect . I accepted his words and started searching for my mum everywhere. But I can't find her . I went upstairs looking for my mum . I was shouting Mumma, Mumma everywhere. But she did not make any sound. Then I heard her voice from one room . The sound of her bangles in her hands was coming at a very high speed and such a ---- "

He stopped . I understood why he stopped .

" It's ok , don't tell me . " I grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckle .

" No , Sunflower. I want to tell you. I want to share everything with you. Not because you want to hear, but because I feel like sharing everything with you. You might not know how much better I am feeling as I am telling you all this. I am feeling very light inside. " He rubbed his nose to mine lightly while caressing my hair and cheeks .

I smiled and nodded and kissed his cheek as his face was closed to mine .

" I opened the door slightly. Seeing what I saw, my face lost it's color and my eyes became wider . In simple terms, both of them are making out . But he was not my papa. He was not. He is a close friend of my father who had come to Rivan's birthday party. " He gulped and squeezed his eyes . My grip tightened around his fist . " It was like a shock . I was just about to call mum but I never did . From that day onwards I never called her mumma . My heart did not want. Whenever I looked at her , all I saw was hatred . At that time I started getting angry not only at my mother but at all women. I began to think that perhaps every girl and every woman are same . Just like this . When I saw my mother with another man, everything went clear in my mind. When I was 8 years old, my mother used to quietly talk to someone on the phone. And that person was all those people who are my father's friends. Since then I have developed a different hatred for women . I did not delay even a bit, that day I went to my father and called him alone and told him the truth. My father did not believe me even that much. How it will happen ? He loved her so much .He loved her beyond limits. After that I quietly took him to the room , opened the door a little and showed him and after seeing that, for the first time in my life, I saw tears in my father's eyes. She is his wife. He too could not believe it. If I carry any guilt throughout my life, then it is just that why am I the son of a woman like her ? And also why the fuck he is my mother . I saw my father crying day and night. Rivan was young at that time. He couldn't understand anything that time . My father decided to divorce her. And I completely agreed with my father at that time. Rivan did not know anything at that time, that is why when my father divorced her, he was crying profusely . It was very painful for him and for me too. Since then I had lost faith in love. I thought I would never love anyone. I didn't even turn to look at a single girl. Because I did not want betrayal in love. One day I found someone , If I've ever stared at anyone for the first time, it's only you. Even then I tried not to look at you. But I melted in you . I felt like I could just keep looking at you. Ever since I saw you, I had decided that this girl is mine. And I ended up winning . " He chuckled at his last sentence .
But I ended up crying . It was not easy for him. Not even a bit . He has lost trust in his mother, so how can he live with the trust of someone else ?