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Liked by t.taliyah, nazzysweep_ and 1,293,739 others falbinbuggin ts too crazy man, i would've never thought i'd lose you so soon. i hope you're resting in paradise baby. you will never be forgotten. comments have been turned off for this post
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"Fallon it's time to go." Sha walks in my room. He had on a nice black tux on. He was so well put together. A fresh cut and retwist.
"I can't." I look at myself in the mirror. I was a mess. Tear stains on my cheeks. Puffy eyes.
"Baby." Sha looks at me, causing me to break down again.
"I'm still not over Jay and now Rami has to go die on me too? What the fuck did I do to deserve this?" I sob, as he holds me close to him.
"It's not your fault, mama." He rubs my back.
"If my phone wasn't on do not disturb, I would've gotten the calls. The texts." I mutter.
"You know you weren't waking up at 1 in the morning for no text, Fal. It wasn't your fault."
I just cried in his arms. No matter what anyone said, it was forever my fault for not being there for my best friend when she needed me.
"We gotta go though. Everyone is waiting for us at the funeral home." Sha stands up, taking my hands.
I wipe my eyes, walking out of my apartment and heading down to the car.
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Naz pulls me in for a long hug. We sit there, embracing each other. Not saying anything. I felt his tears on my forehead. I looked up and caressed his face.
"It wasn't your fault, Nazzy." My thumb strokes his cheek.
He had also blamed himself for Ramiyah's unfortunate passing.
"It wasn't yours either, then." He gives me sad eyes and we go back to hugging each other.
About 20 minutes in, it was my time to read her obituary. I walked up onto the small stage, greeted with familiar faces.
"Hi. I'm Ramiyah's best friend and I've been honored with the task of reading her obituary." I cleared my thought. "Ramiyah Maria Alejandra was born on July 18th, 2006. She was 17 at the time of her passing. She was well known in the community for her beautiful singing voice and civic mindedness. She volunteered at Leadership Prep Bed Stuy to help with the kids and was a para during the summer. Her good attitude and likable personality helped her gain a lot of traction in school and from her community. She is survived by her mom, Isabella, dad, Stefano, and cousin, Taliyah. Ramiyah will forever be in hearts." I croaked the last part, wiping tears from my eyes.
Soft applause came from the audience as the pastor went up to the podium and I went back to my seat. "You did amazing." Shadon whispered to me. I rest my head on his shoulder and let the rest of the service continue.
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"She's probably laughing at us right now." Naz says, passing me the spliff.
"Why do you say that?" I ask, inhaling the smoke, then exhaling shortly after.
"Look at these dumb bitches crying over me." Naz mocks Ramiyah's voice making me laugh.
We sat on the roof of my apartment. Smoking. It was our 3rd spliff of the night. Everyone else had gone home from the repass but me and Naz stayed.
We talked about Ramiyah and how we would live without her. Naz broke up with Mariah for her. Maybe I was wrong about him just wanting the pussy. But knowing Naz, nah.
We sipped Henny, getting cross-faded. Letting this depression float out of our systems.
"I love Henny bro. It's just so- straightforward." Me and Naz say at the same time. Causing us both to smile at each other.
"We should go to Pennsylvania this summer." I tell Naz.
"Why?" He asks.
"Because me and Ramiyah wanted to go to UPenn. I wanna check out the campus and stuff. Just to see what it's like." I shrug.
"Mm." Naz hums.
We pass the spliff and the bottle back and forth. Listening to music, laughing and dancing in memory of Ramiyah.
"Ima head out. I'll call you tomorrow." Naz hugs me, leaving a soft peck on my forehead. He exits the roof and heads downstairs.
I lean over the railing, watching him get into his car and drive away. Leaving me alone with a bottle of Henny and a lot of bad decisions.
