𝑽𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝑯𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔

𝑻𝒂𝒑𝒆 𝑻𝒉𝒓𝒆𝒆

BEGIN AUDIO ON 5/10/18

Hello, it's not you this time, it's me, François.

So, a lot happened. First, me and you are getting married! I'm so happy to be your husband, I'll make your life worthwhile. I enjoy the wedding planning, I'll bake the cake hehe. Anyway, my baby, I'm recording this to make you smile and help you understand what happened when you're well enough to listen to this.

As you know, something happened to you in surgery. It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. The doctors cut too deep, and you were losing too much blood. They couldn't do it. You're very upset, I know, my heart aches for you. You have to stay in the hospital for a bit, but I'm here. Your aunt and uncle are here. Even James came to see you. He looks so much better. Our old friends from the war came to see you, do you remember that? You probably don't, you were really out of it. They came and left you so many presents. Park gave you cigarettes, but not for a while! I know, I know, but how about instead of those silly things, I give you kisses instead?

You'll be out as soon as you know it, I promise. I know it's boring, but it's not permanent. You really scared the shit out of us last night. Your temperature was high, and you were saying that babies were crawling up the walls like that movie Trainspotting. The nurses fixed you, but your uncle told the nurses that maybe they should give the babies milk to calm them down. I really like your uncle, he's so funny.

(PAUSE)

(RESUME)

Right now, by the time I'm recording this, you're napping. Your private is really hurt, but it's healing. We're suing the fuck out those stupid bastards doctors. They hurt you. Nobody hurts my Lloydie. Your parents would've killed them if they were here. They wish they could, but being royalty is super busy, I guess. Your dad, Mr. Doh, sent you flowers and really hopes you feel better soon. I'm starting to not get so afraid of him, he's actually really cool.

I'm not leaving you this time, I'm right here. I've been with you in your room, and you're not in a coma this time. That's good! You're just a bit sick right now. When you feel better, we'll play piano, bake, play with the dogs, we'll do everything you like to do.

I love you so much. I'm here for you. I know that when you're home, you're going to be really disappointed and I'm so sorry. You'll be alright, sweetheart. I'll make sure you are.

Till next time, François signing off.

Wait, how do you turn this off?

(REEEEEEE)

OH MY GOD SHUT THE FUCK UP. Wait, I got it.

(ENDING AUDIO ON 6/10/18 AT THREE HOURS AND 0 MINUTES)