Izzy & Noah

Sixty - five : Emphaty

Not everyone dies, don't get me wrong.

At least not right away.

There are people who come to our ward in a very bad condition, for them weeks count. Sometimes even days.

They are all admitted with a great deal of compassion, because the relatives at home cannot cope, because the condition has changed so much, has deteriorated so much.

We all understand, there are many good stories, there are many stories where the relatives are relieved, but there are also cases where they blame you for everything, where they cannot accept the death.

And I have seen a lot in my three months, you learn both work and life lessons.

How a family doesn't want their own, how they throw them away because they're a nuisance, because they're sick, as long as they could be independent, as long as they were earning money, they were good, and then they're dumped on us.

You know what your children are like when you get old and sick, or so they say.

After the handover, I go to room three to check on the newly admitted patient, to see what she has got out of the therapy.

"Good morning. ˝ I say hello, whether she is conscious or not, I have it in my subconscious that I always say hello.

She doesn't answer anything.

She's obviously asleep.

Good, I'll come back later, I say to myself and head for the preparation room.

Anna is already there.

˝Can I help you? ˝ I ask friendly. There is a bit of a bad mood today.

˝Please go and prepare these antibiotics. ˝ she says.

I don't have to say it twice, if I'm already helping, so I mix the antibiotics in the appropriate solutions, prepare fresh systems for the infusion, wipe down and fill the surgery trolley, the trolley on which we keep everything we need for taking blood samples, setting up venous access and infusion, additional systems...

˝You don't look happy. Is something wrong? ˝ I ask, but I'm not the kind of person who puts pressure on people to open up to me, on the contrary, I don't talk much, I work more, I occupy my mind with work.

˝You know, I don't think it's right that they just leave you to work on your own, but in my time, when there was even more scarcity, I worked for two weeks with a tutor and then I was left on my own, which is very dangerous because you don't know the institution, you don't know how to turn around, what to do. ˝ says Anna and continues to work on her therapy.

˝That is terrible, how did you find yourself? ˝ I ask, surprised and frightened at the same time.

Could I be worried, will I be able to do everything, will I be able to do everything?

The best thing about healthcare is that you're never really alone, there's always someone you can ask, or a senior colleague, or a colleague in another department, there's always someone who knows.

But of course, there are things you have to learn.

What are the basics and what are the essentials that you need to be able to work.

˝ It was difficult because I was on my own, but I managed. Here it takes about two years to know everything. And you're always learning because there are new chemotherapy regimens, new drugs... ˝ Anna says.

I nod.

And I definitely believe her, and when I've done everything, I go back to the ward.

The lady in room three is sitting up and she's very restless.