Chapter 8

92 6 0

by naenaenamjoon

by naenaenamjoon

A/N
Haii! Just wanted to let you know this is a trigger warning. Love to all! xx
_____________________________________________________

Just a lazy night in. Got a glass of wine, some ice cream, and my laptop. I quick check my Facebook, before I start my Gossip Girl marathon. It's blown up with pictures from some wedding. The same wedding. I look through the photos.

"There's Brendon!" I point out. But... why is he dressed so fancy?"

Oh, for fucks sake. Today's his wedding day. He's a married man now.

I stumble upon one photo in particular. It's Brendon and Sarah dancing. The caption is the lyrics to The Very Thought of You.

"I see your face in every flower,
Your eyes in stars above,
It's just the thought of you,
The very thought of you, my love."

I remember Brendon's warm breath on my neck as he would sing me those lyrics. I'm a lone flower in an open valley. I miss him. I miss him SO much. It's painful. I start to cry. I set my laptop on the left of me and I sob. I glance up at the kitchen counter. There is a singular razor.

You know better.

But YOU left the band.

But HE promised to keep touch.

But I abandoned HIM.

I grab the razor and run it over the skin on my wrists over and over. The cuts sting, but I deserve this pain. The cuts go all the way up. I am tired of living this lie.

The reality doesn't just sink in, the reality hits you like a brick.