Welcome to Stonebrook

Thirty Five

~Clay~

"Dad?" 

"Hm?" I looked up from staring at my blank screen on my phone. I'd spent all freaking night trying to work out how to sort this out. Nothing felt strong enough. Nothing was serious enough for her to understand how desperately I needed to fix this. The prospect of not only loosing her, but losing my kid too? 

I didn't have the right to demand she kept it. I could handle it. Another newborn. Starting from scratch all over again. But knowing I'd lost Lor? If it wasn't killing me before when I thought she'd done wrong, now I was dead and burried. How I was still breathing through this unbearable pain, I don't know. 

"You don't look good." 

"Thanks Lib. Really appreciate it." 

"No. I mean, you don't. Are you okay? Nana said I wasn't supposed to ask-"

"You know you can ask me anything Lib." She dropped her spoon back into her cereal with a clang and straightened her back. 

"Why did you and your girlfriend break up?" 

"I thought she did something she didn't." She stared. I didn't not believe in lying to my daughter. When she asked a question, I would do everything to find an answer that was age appropriate for her. She didn't need to know the ins and outs but she could know the basics. 

"So you made a mistake?" 

"Yes." 

"Then why haven't you apologised?" 

"I have. That's where I was last night and why Nana came over to watch you." She blinked at me. 

"Did it work?" 

"Kind of." 

"Kind of isn't an answer." I huffed, putting my hand on my forehead whilst my elbows rested on the table. "Are you two back together? Because you're miserable and grumpy and I want my happy dad back." 

"It's not as easy as kiss and make up Lib." 

"Why not?" How do I even put this? 

"Okay. You know there are different levels of hurt? Like from someone sticking their tongue out at you, to them saying something mean, to them bullying you. But sometimes the way you hurt someone is worse right? So if they throw something at you, it might not hurt physically but if it's someone you trust it hurts more?" 

"Mhm." 

"I assumed she did something to hurt me and was hurt so much I didn't think about it and realise it wasn't like her and then instead of talking about it, I took us camping and didn't go to talk about it and that hurt her." 

"Because you thought she'd hurt you on purpose?" I nodded. "But she didn't?" 

"No." 

"Then why did you think she would?" 

"I don't know." Libby scowled at me. 

"You're a jerk." 

"Yeah. I know." 

"That's really mean. Who is it? I'll go tell them you- you got hit in the head with a football and it knocked your brain out of your head and now you have to clean it everyday to stay clever and you just forgot that day." 

"I somehow don't think she'd buy it." 

"You don't know that! She might be a little stupid herself." 

"Libby." 

"What?! She might be." I sighed. "Come on daaaddd. Who is it? Who is it? Who is it? I can do this all day and I'll get Scout to help me too. Who is it?" 

"Libby." 

"I won't say anything." God, I thought we were over the irritating stage. "Is itt... the lady from the market? With the blue hair?" 

"Olivia." 

"DAAADDDD." She stared at me and took a bite of her cereal. 

"I love you kid." 

"I love you too but I'd love you more if you tell me who your-" 

"Miss Turner." She stopped chewing, her mouth falling open and bits of cereal spilling out of her mouth. 

"Your girlfriend is Miss Turner? From school?" I nod. Libby chews her mouthful of food quickly and jumps down from her chair, pulling a towel to wipe her mouth as she rounds the table and begins to hit me with it. "DID NANA DROP YOU ON YOUR HEAD?!" 

"OLIVIA!" 

"MISS TURNER IS- IS SHE'S AMAZING! HOW COULD YOU HURT HER?!" I manage to push through her outburst, pinning her hands to her side but she just scowls at me. I kneel down in front of her. "She's the best teacher I ever had." 

"I know Lib." 

"And you were dumb and hurt her because- just because?" She gasped. "She was supposed to come camping with us! Is that why you dragged me away from her the last day of school? Oh my god." Her eyes go wide. "Dad, that man said he was her fiancé." Jesus. I ask her to pick up Koda's poo from the garden and she forgets but she remembers one single word said in passing 3 weeks ago? Sure. 

"He lied. He was her ex boyfriend and isn't a nice man." Her eyes narrow and I can see her trying to add everything up like it's a complicated math equation. "But I thought she's been lying to me all that time." 

"You thought she was marrying him?" I nod. "Oh dad." 

"I know. But now I need to work out how to get her back Lib because I miss her. So so much and I can't get it wrong. There's too much at stake." Libby goes quiet and then grins. 

"What?" 

"Well. I spent all year with Miss Turner-" 

"You should probably start calling her Lorelai." 

"Okay. Lorelai. I spent all year with Lorelai. I know all of her favourite things and I know her favourite books and I know everything about her."

"You do?" 

"Mhm. She favourite color is blue, but like blue of the sky in the middle of summer. She likes the beach and hiking and chocolate hearts you get for valentines day, those are some of her favourites. She likes dogs and penguins are her favourite animals and her favourite book is the BFG and her Nana gave her it for Christmas after her dad died. She likes country music and her best friend is Mr. Rhodes." 

"You know her dad died?" 

"Her Nana wrote it in the book. That he will always love her and be proud of her." Libby scowled and grabbed my face. "We need to fix this daddy. Lorelai is the best." 

"I know she is baby. I'm working on it." 

"Well. Work harder."