An Unbreakable Bond

I Don't Want to be Strong Right Now

Synopsis: Towa liked to say he was independent and didn't need to rely on anyone for help. But, one night he just can't escape nightmare after nightmare every time he closed his eyes.

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Towa liked to pride himself on how independent he could be. He hated when people tried to treat him like a kid. He could handle himself very well. He wasn't a child anymore.

Bamba had taunt him independence from quite a young age. While he wasn't cruel about it, Bamba had been firm about Towa never relying on him for simple things unless he absolutely needed to. He needed to be able to fend for himself.

And normally, that was fine. Towa had no issue being made to handle small things by himself. It was annoying to do, but he always came out fine. And honestly he was glad that he was taught to handle stuff on his own so well.

However, tonight was a different story. He had been restlessly sleeping. His dreams were plagued by nightmares. It was probably being spurred on by how stressed he was at the moment. Too much was going down in such a short amount of time.

Towa found himself jolting awake from another nightmare. The third one tonight. He had pushed through the first two and went back to sleep. This nightmare though... had been a lot worse.

He was breathing heavily. His body was covered in sweat despite the coolness of the room. His heart felt like it was going to pound its way right out of his chest. Towa bit back tears. He wouldn't cry. But... he didn't know if he could keep going like this for tonight.

Towa sat up and looked around the room. Bamba was asleep on a bed on the other side of the room. He was rolled onto his side, his back facing Towa. Towa was a little jealous of how peacefully he was sleeping.

The only light in the room was from the moon outside. Towa got off the bed and walked to the window. He stared at the stars for a while, watching as they twinkled in the air. The moon was just about full. Only a few days before it would be from the look of it.

The town was silent this late at night. The only noise was of nature. There was a slight breeze in the air, making the trees shake with some noise.

Towa didn't know what to do. He doubted he was going to get back to sleep anytime soon. His body was too startled from the nightmare right now. There was no way he was settling down enough.

He debated just laying there until he passed out or until it was time to get up, but that didn't sound very appealing. Towa didn't want to go outside the room either. He worried he might disturb someone by moving around.

His gaze landed back on Bamba. He hadn't moved from his position since he had last looked. Towa debated waking him. Would Bamba scold him for doing so? It wasn't like he could really help him anyway.

Towa decided against it and crawled back into his bed. He closed his eyes and just hoped a peaceful sleep would come for him. He was tired. He didn't want to be awake right now.

...

Towa woke with a gasp. He had fallen asleep at some point, only to be greeted with an even worse nightmare. He was disoriented as he woke. He couldn't tell what was real right now. Tears were stinging at the corner of his eyes as he took in labored breaths. He couldn't do this...

In one quick movement, Towa shed his blankets and got up. He stumbled to Bamba's bed, his footing uneven due to his dizziness. He crawled onto the bed and shoved himself up against Bamba.

"Towa...?" The sudden movement appeared to have woken Bamba up.

Towa didn't have a voice to reply. He just let out a small sob and buried himself further against his brother's back. His entire body trembled.

Bamba turned around and forced Towa to look at him. Towa couldn't meet his gaze.

"What happened?" Bamba asked softly, reaching a hand up to wipe away some tears from Towa's eyes.

"Nightmare..." Towa managed to reply.

"A pretty bad nightmare, huh?" Bamba frowned at his response.

"Hug..." Towa demanded, his voice cracking.

"Come here." Bamba obliged and pulled him into a tight hug.

At least he realized now was not the time to do anything but help him. Towa was glad to not be told to deal with it alone.

"Sorry..." Towa mumbled. "I tried, nii-san... I tried to be brave..."

"Shh... it happens." Bamba hushed him. "You're more than welcome to ask for help sometimes. Just don't make it a habit. That's all I ever asked for."

Towa nodded. He sniffled and moved in closer into the embrace. Bamba ran a hand across his back a few times. Towa was starting to calm down now.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Bamba questioned.

Towa shook his head. He did not have it in him to talk about his nightmares right now. Maybe in the morning he would. But he just wanted to forget about it right now.

"That's fine. I'm here if you decide to later." Bamba accepted his response. "Try and get some rest. If you do have another bad dream don't be afraid to wake me up if I don't do it on my own. Okay?"

"Okay..." Towa agreed.

Bamba pressed a few light kisses onto his head. Towa closed his eyes and sunk into the embrace more. He felt safer like this. Hopefully being held would chase the nightmares away.

"Nii-san..."

"Yes?"

"I love you..."

"I love you too, Towa. Sweet dreams." Bamba placed another kiss on his head. "A kiss to chase away the bad dreams."

Towa managed to chuckle. "You always do that, nii-san."

"And has it worked?"

"Yeah... it always does seem to work."

"Then why wouldn't I do it?"

"Because I'm getting too old for it."

"You're always going to be my little brother no matter what."

"Nii-san!"

Bamba chuckled. "Get some rest. I'd love to talk more but I'm barely staying awake right now, Towa."

"Goodnight, nii-san."

"Night."

Towa shifted around into a better position and then focused on trying to sleep again. He heard Bamba fall asleep before long. Towa hoped he would be able to sleep peacefully like him now. Even if Bamba said it was okay, he still would feel bad about disturbing him again.

Sleep did come a bit easier to him this time. And thankfully, he dreamt no more that night.