Once upon a time a girl stole a spinning wheel from a carboot sale which hadn't been cleaned and she struck her finger on the needles and got an infection, and she had an alletgic reaction to the medicine she was taking, so she passed out in a coma for the next 20 years, until one young man was looking through the yellow pages and came acroos her families name and they needed a cleaner and a dog walker so he came along... came along.. came along, saw her beauty and the ugliest t-shirt with happy christmas with a black santa on it, saw the irony and tipped and fell and crushed his nose breaking it but his lips touched hers and this was a so, as the parents had practiced magic, vood doo and witchcraft, their spell that if she was ever kissed she'd wake up - to hell if they would kiss her, that abusive, and they never expected anybody else to given she was locked in a room in a coma but it was so... and this is completely true.... so she woke up... and her and the prince fell in love at first sight as their personalities and star signed matched perfectly, this was just the astrological way of the universe and all and it made complete sense as the man was 42, so having the answer to life, the universe and everything, they had lots of sex and babies and lived in a social home on benefits for the rest of their near homeless lives......
Meanwhile in ireland, a young girl was found to be looking as pale as a ghost when somebody reveleaed that she had been caught cheating on her missing husband with several dozen dwarves and so she was named snow white, and they were to prove themselves by working in mines all their lives so that she could gt enough monex to win a court case against "that witch!" and she won but only because her husband returned and he was, like, the prince of russia so he had the automatic right and all..........
do you really not believe me?
I'll tell you what the agents just asked me during the meal - to write a guiltiness e-mail regarding myself, i will tell you, i have done something terrible while very drunk once.................... Don't ask me whatthe fuck it is, i don fricking remember a thing!!!!!!!!!!!!
hahahahahaha!
