Total Drama All Stars: My dumb self made ANOTHER self-insert

Evil Dread

Chris: Last time on Total Drama... I welcomed the all-stars to the newly decontaminated island. Then, it was heroes vs. villains diving into shark-infested waters in search of the one key that would unlock the door to the all-new McLean spa hotel for winners only. Thanks to Scott's cowardly fear of sharks, we learned that inside every robot beats the heart of a Spaniard. In this case, Alejandro. And while Alejandro might not hold the key to Heather's heart anymore, he did hold the key to the spa hotel and victory for the Villainous Vultures! And the Heroic Hamsters bid farewell to Lindsay, via our newest and most humiliating commode of transportation. The Flush of Shame! Who will be next to pop through the pooper? Find out right now on Total. Drama. All-Stars!

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[ theme song]

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Mike: [as Chester] There's a storm a-comin', dagnabbit! [deep inhale] [as Svetlana] I'm scared! After all these years, he's going to return! [deep inhale] [as Vito] Ay, yo, how we gonna stop this Goomba? [deep inhale] [as Manitoba] Hush it, mates. Mike is wakin' up! [as himself] Huh? Eh, what's that? You guys say something?

Cameron: [snoring]

Sam: [snoring] Meh.

[mosquito slurps]

Sam: [groans]

[mosquito sloshing]

[camera snap]

Courtney: Ah! What the heck?!

Zoey: Courtney? What's wrong?

Courtney: What's wrong is that we're sharing a cabin with a super-fan with a bad case of crazy!

Sierra: [chuckles] Hey, Courtney! I've updated the sleeping section of your picture gallery on my fan site! Whee! [confessional] I hate to break Chris' rules about smuggling in special items like my cell phone, but I have to keep my TD blogs current! Zoey's even sweeter than she is on TV. Courtney is even Courtney-er than ever! It's better this way. Last time, I had a teensy bit of a problem with internet withdrawal. Without this link to Cody-Wody, I'd probably lose my mind! [real time] Oh, internet, Never leave me!

Chef: Room service, suckas!

Zoey, Courtney, and Sierra: Ah!

Courtney: What's wrong with you?!

Chef: Here's breakfast! [chuckles]

Sierra: Thank you, Chef.

Courtney: We've got to win the next challenge and get into that spa hotel.

Sierra: [munching] True love sure does build an appetite! [eating]

Scott: Oh, I am diggin' this. I can't wait to be a millionaire. I woke up at 5 AM this morning to watch the releasing of the doves, and I'm just gonna say it. It was beautiful. [blows nose]

Duncan: Yeah, this is the life. And if we keep winning challenges, we can live like kings all season! To villainy!

[clink]

Gwen: Yeah. Unh, villainy.

Duncan: 'Sup with you, doll face?

Gwen: Wha? Oh! Uh... nothing. Just uh, you know, uh, wondering how 's doing on Boney Island?

Bentley: I smell bogus over my pancakes.

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