The Bad Girl's Good Side

Chapter 5: I drove him away

Chapter 5: I drove him away.

"Hi." I greet a very good looking Tristan as I open the door.

"hi." he breathes out and shoves his hands into his jean pockets.

"Wanna come in?" I ask.

"Sure."

I step aside and allow him to enter. He makes himself at home and sit on one of the leather couches in the living room.

"You want anything to drink?" I ask him.

"I'm fine." He shakes his head. "I just came to tell you something."

"Okay. . ." I drawl out and sit next to him. "But before you say anything, I want to say I'm sorry."

"Hailey I--" He tries to speak, but I cut him off.

"Let me finish." I say. "I'm sorry for not understanding that you had to do what you did for my safety. I'm sorry that I was upset for no reason, I was angry and overwhelmed." I say all of this without looking at him in the eye, but at my hands. "And lastly, I'm sorry for letting you go." I breathe out and a tear betrays me by slipping down my cheek.

"Hailey--" I cut him off again.

"I want you back." I finally say the words that have made my heart heavy. Those words have been suffocating me day in, day out, and I have finally said them. I looked up to meet his gaze. "I want you back, Tristan."

A tear escapes my left eye, followed by a humorless laugh, as I gaze into the open. My eyes are focused on the trees lining our backyard. The moon is shining at its brightest tonight and stars fervently glitter the night sky. A soft breeze hugs my frame in a comforting manner as I stand on the balcony.

I wish I had not said those words.

He says nothing. For a long agonizing minute he stays silent. But the piercing silence is shattered once he takes in a deep breath before saying, "I'm leaving."

What?!

No words come out of my mouth. It is as if someone retracted all the words in my vocabulary. My tongue is tied and my throat is clogged.

Tristan notices my crestfallen expression, mixed with a tint of confusion, yet he still carries on. "I came to say goodbye and that my plane leaves in about an hour."

That was the worst 'goodbye' ever. I feel like it was the final sign indicating that I have truly and inevitably drive him away due to my stubbornness.

It was a sign that I have finally lost what was good.

"Y-you c-can't j-just--" I stutter.

"I'm sorry." He sighs.

I can see that this is hurting him as much as it is hurting me.

"Sorry?!" I explode with anger and jump to my feet. "Sorry?! Sorry won't fix anything, Tristan!" I yell at him.

"Don't you think I know that?!" He stands up as well. "I have no choice!" He drags a hand through his brown locks.

"No, everyone has a choice!" I argue.

"Well, I don't have one, okay?"

"What do you mean?"

"I have nothing left to do here. I'm done with high school and I have dreams to pursue. Someone called me and offered me a job opportunity and I'm taking it."

"What about me? Us?" At this moment, tears are dripping down my face like an open water faucet.

"I think that space it what we need."

Space.

Five letters, one word, yet as sharp as a soldier's sword. Words are the strongest form of weapons. They hurt you emotionally, spiritually, and sometimes, physically.

I have come to hate that word. It brings me grief. It made me lose what I had loved and cared for.

"Hailey?" A voice pulls me out of my reverie.

I turn back to face my father, who is dressed in his pyjamas and a blue robe.

"Hey, Dad." I force a smile on my face.

"Are you alright?" Concern swirls in my father's irises. "I'll make us hot cocoa." He says before I can respond, and leaves to go make the delicious treat.

I heave out a heavy sigh and trudge back inside the house after closing the balcony doors. I trudge further to the kitchen to keep my dad company as he makes the cocoa.

I can't believe he is not my biological father.

I wonder if he knows that. If he knows that I'm not his blood. Mother had commanded me not to discuss the issue in the house or else we'll all have a great wage to pay.

"Something's bothering you?" My father's voice pierces my eardrum. He walks around the kitchen island and hands me a hot mug of hot cocoa.

"Sort of." I lift the mug to my lips and take a careful sip. "Thanks." I gesture to the mug.

"No problem, kiddo." He nods. "Does this have to do with Tristan's leave?" He enquires further.

I nod.

"Did he explain why he left?" He takes a sip from his own mug.

"Nope. I was hoping his parents told you."

"They did not mention anything."

"I miss him, Dad." I sigh. "And it's all my fault that he's gone. I drove him away."

"What do you mean?" He asks, perplexed.

"Long story short-- I was too stubborn and angry." I keep it short so that I don't reveal any confidential information.

"Don't worry, honey." He gives me a side embrace. "Everything will eventually fall into place." He softly pecks my forehead.

"But it feels like everything is falling apart. It has fallen apart actually."

"Sometimes old buildings are demolished in order to be replaced by newly upgraded ones because the foundation of the old ones were already wearing out."

I ponder for a few seconds about what he said, letting it sink in further.

I pray he is right.

"Goodnight, kiddo." He kisses my forehead once more and leaves me rooted in the kitchen.

"Night." I sigh.

I pray the new building will be built quickly.

~

End of another chapter.

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-Savannah Pirtle