One Door Closes

Chapter 16

Despite the little incident, nothing has changed between Emma and I. Except there's a part of me that longs for Emma to ask me one more time if I want to have sex with her, because this time I have an answer ready.

After that Jack guy, Emma has slept with a few more men, but she told me that she's stopped it now. She's nearing the end of her pregnancy and she's either exhausted or paranoid about the birth of her baby.

We don't know the gender yet, but Emma says she thinks it'll be a boy. She's constantly thinking of names, but keeps switching.

"I can only think of girls' names," she said, yesterday. "What do you name a boy? I feel all names suck."

"You'll figure it out," I responded and I feel like she's let it go. I've given her a couple suggestions, but they were dismissed before I'd even completed saying them.

She's leaning against me, on my couch, and reading a book. Her chest rises and falls peacefully and she swallows, she's nearing the end and I gather it's emotional.

Suddenly, she closes the book and puts it away on the floor. She has a tear on her cheek and looks at me. "Finished it. What a shitty ending. I wanted something that ends good, not this crap." She wipes her cheeks and sighs. "I'm so done with this."

"You'll find a better book, Emma." I try to soothe her, but she lets out an exaggerated sigh.

"No, I'm done with this pregnancy. I thought I'd have a baby by the time I finished this book and I don't. Why is it taking so long?"

I stroke her cheek. Her skin is soft. Somehow, I've gotten used to the way her body feels against mine in the past months, even though we never did anything inappropriate.

"What is taking long?"

"This baby." Emma groans and sighs. "I thought it would be born by now. I don't want to be pregnant anymore." She's taken on a whiny tone, but I don't mind. I understand. I'm ready for this baby to be born as well.

"It's not due for another two days. You should just enjoy this moment. It's one of the last times without your child being born. Go wild."

"Go wild? Have you seen me, Regina? I'm so fat I can barely get off the couch, I can't drink alcohol, I can't smoke, I can't have sex unless I find someone willing to fuck a whale that can't do anything but lie on the couch. All I can do is read a book with a cup of tea and that's what I've been doing for the past nine months and it sure as hell isn't wild."

Emma groans again and huffs, evidently irritated. She's been on edge for about a week now. I can tell she's dying for this to be over and I hope for both our sakes that the baby doesn't take long anymore.

Despite her tired expression, she looks beautiful. She moves away from my shoulder with a sigh and looks at me. "What book shall I read now?" There's a sarcastic undertone.

It's true that she's read a lot of books over the past months. Some of them to prepare her for the birth and raising a child, but also some solely for leisure time.

I understand that she wants to do something different, something exciting. She moves to get off the couch, but I hold her wrist, pulling her back.

A flicker of confusion washes over her face and I gulp, before I lean forward and press my lips against hers in a swift movement. It takes only a second for Emma to kiss me back.

I savor this moment. I know my mind will come up with countless ways of making me feel guilty or bad about this, but right now my mind is empty.

All I can focus on is Emma's soft lips against mine, her warm hands on my face and my chest and the soft sounds escaping her throat.