Beta Squad ♡ bxb ♡ one-shots

Niko x AJ [touch starvation]

[This took forever and it's gonna be more parts. Also I'm kinda sick and stressed so excuse any mistakes pls.]

[Tw: kinda descriptive panic attack]

No smut; slow burn (no action in pt.1 whatsoever)

The stupid picture was what started it all.

The stupid picture and that one stupid comment that said: "making up for the lack of physical contact with stuffed animals🙃go off king"

And it wasn't like Aj wasn't aware of liking oversized clothes or favouring stuffed animals that were as big as him, but now-

Now, he was painfully observant about it.

Now, he thinks he had always known, to an extent, that he liked soft things. Big jumpers and mountains of pillows and blankets to wrap up in.

But there had never been that awareness of making up for something that was missing.

Because he didn't need it. He never did before, he was fine. Just fine.

He was a man and he was loved by his friends and he could touch if he wanted to, couldn't he? He could drape himself across Chunks' neck and do piggyback rides with Kenny, and he was fine with Sharkys motherhenning and Nikos' compulsive need to hold his hands.

He was fine.

Except for the tiny voice in his head that just wouldn't go away no matter what, always reminding him, in case he forgot to -

Step back, don't touch,
you've had enough contact,
move your hips,
lean your chest back,

They will know
They will know
They will know

Move fucking move
Don't stay still, be the party,
the fucking light

Tell 'em you hate it, you hate it, you do
You don't like it and that means they won't know you crave it

The touch, the love, the affection of another man -

No. That's wrong - that's disgusting
You can't be wrong,
they will know if you don't move,

They will know, They will know, They-

He was fine. He didn't need the extra hugs and the gentle touch he knew the others shared.

There was no need to feel excluded, the distance was his own doing after all. He just needed to suck it up and act like a man. It wasn't like he would die due to no hugs. Right? That wasn't possible.

But then- that stupid comment.

Which brought him to where he is now. Hiding away in his room, carefully googling 【can you die from not hugging 】and scrolling through the results.

The first link that had popped up was about touch starvation which okay. Calm down, that wasn't real, he wasn't that desperate.

Shaking his head, he threw the phone down on his bed and went to the kitchen to have a glass of water.

Walking into the room he saw Niko with a spatula in his hand, gesturing with it to George, who was holding a camera.

"Eyy, there's Aj!", Niko called out, as soon as Aj stepped into the kitchen.

"Now, what's going on here?", he asked back playfully.

"Uhm I'm cooking clearly. Being a chef and all that, you know. Highly professional." Niko tapped himself against the temple with his spatula as if to demonstrate his thinking skills.