Destroyer - Chris Evans

How about settling down?

Chris' POV

Mom flashes a warm smile, as she continues to set the table. "So, Chris, how was Brazil?"

"Really good." I nod, reaching for the wine glasses she's handing me, as I help her. Iris and Scot are watching me too, now awaiting my answer. "It was actually a lot more beautiful than I initially thought. Quite different, in a way. Didn't get too much free time, though."

The smile lingers on mom's lips as she asks, a glimmer of curiosity in her eyes, "You didn't find anyone special over there?"

I frown, leaning back slightly on the counter. A feeling of resistance fills me as I cross my arms.

"A girl." Mom sighs.

"No.." I state calmly, locking eyes with her. There's a flicker of understanding in her eyes, but they're also tinged with a subtle disappointment, one she can't fully hide.

"What, ma?" I sigh.

Iris watches us attentively, while Scott has started scrolling his phone, pretending not to pay attention.

Mom shrugs and turns around, washing her hands, trying to dismiss the conversation.

I let out a breath, forcing my frustration to wind down. "I'm not in a hurry."

"No, I understand, Chris." Mom continues. "I'm just..." her words trail off, leaving the unspoken question lingering in the air.

"Just what?" I press, my tone slightly defensive.

"Well, you're starting to come to an age where..." Mom hesitates, choosing her words carefully. "Don't you want to settle down soon?"

Scott doesn't manage to conceal his curiosity, and he too discreetly observes our interaction.

"I..." I begin, my voice faltering as I'm not sure what to reply. It's not like the thought hasn't crossed my mind a million times over. The truth is, it's a concern that's been quietly present the last years, though admitting that now, will be like swallowing a bitter pill. My throat constricts, suddenly dried out. I've had my fare share of relationships, none of which have seemed to progress or mature into anything remotely close to settling down. It's left me tired, and to be truthful, I'm haunted with fear that I might never find someone I can truly envision a future with. It's a silent dread that I may not be able to settle down with that someone, if I do find her. That I won't be able to have what I truly desire. Who I truly desire.

"I'm not meaning to pry, Chris." Mom fills the silence that has appeared, as I was lost in thoughts, and places the silverware neatly on the table. "It's just that... Well, I want what's best for you, and... I know how you've always wanted a big family, and I worry that you're waiting too long. I'm sure it's great enjoying your freedom, but don't you want to find a girl to stick too? Someone to build a life with?"

"I..." I feel a tightening in my chest, an unexpected pressure to respond. I knew of mom's impatience, but I didn't expect that she had these concerns. With a casual shrug, an attempt to conceal my emotions, I defend myself, "I do want that, I just... Haven't found the right one."

"Maybe you should grow up a little?" Mom suggests, raising an eyebrow. "Not just fool around with the prettiest things you find..."

The tension in the room grows palpable. Scott's eyebrows shoot up to the top of his head, and he clears his throat awkwardly. Iris shifts uncomfortably in her seat, her gaze flitting between me and mom. Though I'm good at masking it, her words get to me.

I crack a smile, trying to lighten the atmosphere. "Come on, ma..."

"Just saying, Chris, if you keep this up, you'll stay a bachelor. I don't want that for you. I don't want you to end up alone."