Hidden Burdens (working title)

The Complexity of Forgiveness

The week of Thanksgiving, Mary wanted to visit Ivan, alone without her brother. 

The visit was already planned to be moved to Wednesday because of the holiday. At first, Miguel protested he didn’t want to miss his weekly visit, but Mary promised it was only for one week and that she would make it up to him somehow. 

The boy still grumbled and hesitated. Eventually, he said, “Fine,” and admitted he was happy Mary was going to see their dad. 

Mary managed a smile for her brother. Ben could see she was masking her feelings for him, knowing this wasn’t exactly a social visit.

So, Ben made the call to Jennifer to let her know about the change of plans. 

To his surprise, Mary also wanted Ben there, even though Kayla had been taking Miguel to the visits. As much as the girl loved Kayla, she felt better having Ben there. Though, Ben and Kayla made sure to pray both the night and morning before Kayla left for work.

“You don’t need to say anything,” she told him with a hand on his shoulder. “Just be there for Mary. Only step in if you absolutely have to.” 

Kimmy’s appointment with Nicole had been moved up to that Monday since the woman was going out of town Tuesday evening anyway. So, once the other kids were dropped off, Ben took Mary to grab a donut before the visit and help prepare her. 

“I don’t know what he’s gonna say when he sees me,” she said, staring at her pumpkin spice donut.

Ben used his finger to catch the inner custard of his Bosten Creme so it wouldn’t spill out and sucked it off. “Kayla says he asks about you,” he reminded her. “Pretty much every time.”

Mary looked lost in thought. 

He reached over and gave her hand a loving, reassuring squeeze. Ben still wasn’t fully sure why Mary had picked him when Kayla was a much better choice, especially after that blow-up from Halloween weekend. She just didn’t want any advice or encouraging words. Having Ben there was more than enough for her. 

On the drive to the jail, Ben prepared Mary for the procedures of getting inside and the rules while they were there. Before getting out of the truck, Ben prayed once more, with Mary this time. It was more awkward than one of Kayla’s prayers. He usually just winged it and said whatever came to mind. 

Hopefully, God got the gist of what he was trying to say. 

Since Mary had been to her court hearing, she was familiar with going through a security check. They met Kurt like always, and he introduced himself to Mary before following him to the visitor area. 

As they walked down the hallway, Ben felt Mary grab onto his hand as if she were her brother’s age. He gave it another reassuring squeeze, meeting each other’s gaze for a moment. 

They waited at a table for an officer to fetch Ivan. 

Mary kept her back to the entrance while Ben rubbed a gentle hand along it, keeping an eye out for her. When Ivan entered, he pointed him out to her. 

She turned on the spot, now sitting sideways on the bench. 

Ben encouraged the girl to stand as Ivan got closer. 

He stopped a few feet away. No one said anything for a minute, though Ben wondered if he should be the one to get things going. He held his tongue as Kayla suggested. 

It was Ivan who broke the silence. 

“It’s good to see you, Nena.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Mary replied, awkwardly.