𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐄𝐅𝐓 𝐌𝐄, finnick odair

𝟬𝟮𝟯. not fair

╔═*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*═╗
023. not fair
╚═*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*═╝

finnick leaned against the cold, concrete wall of his room in district 13, staring blankly at the gray tiles beneath his feet. it was late, very late, but he hadn't slept well since the quarter quell. he knew if lyra were there she'd say what she always did when she caught him gazing up at the stars instead of sleeping. 'you need to let the stars rest, they can't sparkle all night just for you'

he'd decided early on that he didn't like district 13. there was no air there, no ocean, no cool breeze, no sunlight. only cold, damp, echoing concrete. everything was orderly and efficient. it looked like the rebellion had sucked the life and comfort from everything and everyone he saw. finnick couldn't understand how anyone got any sleep in this place. not when there was nothing to look forward to when they woke up.

no sun, no wind, no ocean, no lyra.

finnick ran his hands over his face, rubbing his eyes harshly as he tried to get rid of any signs of tiredness. if his mind wouldn't allow him to sleep, the least he could do was something, anything useful. his mind wandered back to his conversation with katniss earlier in the week.

he liked the girl, he really did. she reminded him of lyra before the capitol had hollowed her out. the way her eyes narrowed, the way she spoke of the capitol, he knew it all too well. the capitol had wronged her as they did lyra but nevertheless, she acted as though still had something to fight for.

lyra had gone through too much. she had taken a well deserved break from the fighting a long time ago and was yet to return.

lyra's face appeared in his mind, a flicker of warmth shining through his dark thoughts. he knew thinking of her only made it worse but he couldn't help himself. the capitol had her. what were they doing to her now? the thought made his chest tighten. the videos hadn't stopped. repeats of what had happened before. minor details revealing that they were in fact separate events.

finnick looked down at his hands, watching as they trembled slightly as he pulled another piece of rope from his jacket pocket. it was an old habit, one he never managed to kick despite the pain and cuts it inflicted on his hands. the familiar sensation of knotting the rope calmed him, it gave him something to focus on other than the fear, saddened thoughts, and guilt that ripped at his insides.

his hands moved automatically, tying knots in the same way he'd practiced for years back in district 4. back when it was just him and lyra. finnick paused after a few minutes, his hands stilled on the rope as his knuckles turned white. he could hear a faint murmur of people moving in the hall outside his door.

a knock on the door startled him. he dropped the rope, his heart pounding unexpectedly. it was rare for anyone to come and find finnick, they knew he didn't want visitors. he stood slowly, not sure whether he was gong to ignore the call or not.

in the end, he decided against ignoring it, reasoning with himself that there could be information about lyra on the other side. when he opened the door, it was beetee hovering quietly outside the room.

"finnick" beetee said, his voice steady but welcoming still "i thought i'd come check on you, you didn't come out for breakfast"

"hmm" finnick greeted him, standing aside and motioning for him to come in. he quickly moved back to his spot on the bed, shuffling back to lean against the wall once again "i'm fine i'm just... i'm not sure what i am actually"

beetee wheeled himself inside, shitting the door behind him and quickly observing the bare room. he made no comment on its lack of decoration, instead, he simply nodded "i know what you mean" he said quietly "but i thought you might want some company"