Sunbeam

26) You're not mad

"I'm surprised to see you so soon," Bea states, when Kezia walks back into the house.

"Where's Ada?" Kezia asks, glancing over at Bea who was washing dishes.

"John drove her home," Beatrice responds, "she wanted to be alone. Doesn't want to see anybody."

"Why are you still here?" Kezia queries, taking a swig from her bottle of whiskey.

"Polly was tired, I offered to clean up," Bea states, hesitating slightly before asking, "why are you back so soon?"

"What'd you mean?" Kezia responds.

"... Grace," Beatrice says.

"Oh that was never going to happen," Kezia scoffs.

"Well it has," Bea replies.

"I meant tonight, I wasn't ever going to go home with her, I needed a distraction, and well... she was there," Kezia states.

"A distraction from what? We were at a wedding," Bea responds.

"Ada told me, Bea," Kezia says, "Pol told her that I'd been acting weird, she asked me why, I told her, and then she said to speak to you because you were in a similar situation, going through a bad breakup, but you'd found someone new."

"Kez," she sighs.

"No, it's fine, I knew it would come eventually, it was just a bit of a surprise," Kezia shrugs, leaning against a counter.

"I'm not seeing someone new," Bea states, "I went on a date, just one, I realised it would never work out."

"You're not mad," Kezia realises, "when I walked in here, I was prepping myself to get screamed at."

"For what?" Bea asks.

"For Freddie." Kez states.

"Oh, Kez, I know you well enough to know you'd never do that to your sister," Beatrice laughs, "Ada's just overwhelmed, deep down she knows you wouldn't do this, she just needs some time to think."

"Right," Kez hums.

"Back to our prior conversation," Bea says, "Kez, I know it won't work between us, but that doesn't mean I'm able to just move on. It's not easy for me either."

"I know that," Kezia nods.

"You seriously weren't thinking of going home with Grace?" Bea asks.

"Course I wasn't, I'm not that drunk," Kezia says, "I was hurting, and I thought it would provide some form of comfort, which it did not."

"So you were just using her tonight" Beatrice states.

"No... maybe," Kez says.

"That's not nice, Kez," Bea replies.

Kezia scoffs, "don't go feeling bad for Grace, I can assure you she had a great time whilst it lasted, she also does not deserve sympathy."

"She talks about you a lot at work, she cares, Kez," Beatrice says.

"Don't go scolding me about getting with people who are in love with you, you have no leg to stand on," Kezia responds.

"I wouldn't say she's in love with you," Bea replies.

"She would," Kez states.

"She told you she loves you?" Bea queries, and Kez nods, "about half an hour ago."

"And what... what did you say?" Beatrice stutters.

"Bullshit," Kezia says.

"Oh wow," Bea laughs, "such a charmer."

"I do try," Kez shrugs, "can we not talk about Grace?"

"Okay, what do you want to talk about?" Beatrice queries.

"Kez," Finn yawns, appearing at the door to the kitchen.

"Everything alright, buddy?" Kezia asks.

"I had a bad dream," Finn replies, walking over to where she was leant against the counter, hugging her, "you almost died, you were shot."

Kez softly strokes his hair, "don't you go worrying about that, all's okay."

"Right now," Finn responds, "one day it might not be. You're going to die and leave me behind."

"Not for a very long time," Kezia states, "you're going to be stuck with me for a while, don't get your hopes up."

"I can think of worse things than being stuck with you," Finn replies.

"When did you become a little sweet talker?" Beatrice teases.

"I learnt from the best," Finn smiles, looking up at Kez.

"You two really are a troublesome duo," Bea laughs.

"Me? Trouble?" Finn gasps, "never. Her I understand, but me?"

"Finn, you once told the entire lane your family were throwing a party here, and sat on the stairs giggling as you watched them get confused as to why their house was filled with neighbours drinking," Beatrice responds.

"That doesn't sound like something I'd do," Finn shakes his head, "I was just a child, I must have had some influence."

"Kez, really?" Bea says.

"In my defence, it was really funny and everyone ended up having a great time apparently, I wouldn't know, I went to the pub, I didn't want to be surrounded by people in my own house," Kezia responds.

"You let Finn take the blame all these years?" Bea asks.

"He didn't get in trouble, if they got mad, I would have intervened, but everyone found it funny, and ended up getting smashed," Kezia shrugs.

"Trouble, the both of you," Beatrice states.

"Someone's got to keep the family entertained," Finn says.

"The little family jester," Kezia teases.

"I'm still growing," Finn remarks, "I'll be taller than you one day."

"I'm sure you will," Kezia says, "but until that day comes, I get to call you little."

"So when I'm taller I get to call you little?" Finn replies.

"Do it at your own risk," Kezia states.

"You don't scare me," Finn says, "those are empty words and we both know it, future little sister."

"Oh fucking hell," Kez groans.

"He's got you there, Kez," Bea laughs.

Finn yawns, and Kez smiles, "let's get you back to bed."

"And you'll still be here tomorrow?" Finn asks.

"Of course I will," Kez states, "say good night to Bea."

"Night, Bea," Finn waves, before giving Kezia puppy dog eyes, Kez sighs before crouching down so Finn could jump onto her back.

"I think I'm going to head home," Bea says, "all the cleaning is done."

"Thank you, Bea," Kez replies, "do you mind trying to keep an eye on Ada? I doubt she wants me around at the moment."

"Of course." Bea nods, biting her lip to stop herself smiling as Kez carries Finn up to bed, at this rate it was going to be impossible to move on, nobody could ever make her feel the way Kez does. But she knew it wouldn't work, she could not imagine a scenario in which they would work out, and each time she reminded herself of that, she felt her heart deflate a little.