A/N: This is set before the entirety of this book. Me, being the creator, I'll make bonus skits and then act like they never happened!
(N/A's pov)
It was a normal day in the countryhuman's world meeting. Or so that was what was told......
America's phone started ringing once more. The countries paused and looked over at the superpower country. The American had a very angry expression on their face. Answering the phone, many voices came over.
"MA' WE HAVE ISSUES!" A child voice yelled over the phone, Mexico looked over at America with a very surprised expression.
"What happened this time, Tex?" The american asked.
"Uhhhhhh.......Florida decided to throw himself off the roof and mom had to catch him, now he's being reprimanded and uncle Confetti is just laughing his ass off." The voice, now labeled as Tex answered.
The country just pinched the bridge of their nose.
"I'LL SPEAK FRENCH BETWEEN YOUR LEGS!" Another voice yelled.
"The hottest things I've even been told." Another responded.
"I'm just picturing someone screaming BONJOUR at a penis." Someone said, a few started laughing.
"Sacre bleu mademoiselle vagina. Hon hon hon titty croissants!" Another voice yelled in broken French.
"TITTY CROISSANTS!" Someone yelled in english but between laughs.
"None of you should ever be having sex." America said to the voices on the other end of the phone.
The voices on the phone just started laughing like crazy, until running was heard and the sound of dead silence took over.
"Oh gods, my husband isn't home and I forgot the english word for this thing and it's BAD. He usually helps, but I CAN'T!" An adult sounding voice said this time. America became blue in blush.
Canada swiped the american's phone out of their hand. "I will assist?" The canadian said in a confused tone.
"You know that little sea bug with the stupid hands and it has a home but it changes homes sometimes because it gets too big for it? What is it??" The adult voice came over, more woman sounding this time.
"Hermit crab?" England yell asked in a way.
"THAT'S THE BITCH!" The voice responded in a yell.
Japan, Germany, Australia, New Zealand and Canada started laughing like crazy. A beep was heard and the phone call ended.
"Sweet lord." New Zealand said, still laughing.
"Who was that?" A russian sounding voice asked, a few countries froze when the voice was heard.
"America's wife!" Japan answered, still laughing and the other countries who were laughing were laughing even harder than before.
"YOU'RE MARRIED!?" England and France asked in shock.
The american nodded in response. "I'm married, yes. I believe it was July 17th 1776." The country said before snapping their fingers and nodding. The american looked down to see their family laughing on the floor. Sighing they looked away.
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I'll post bonus chapters on wednesday's while official chapters will still be posted on weekends, that won't change! Unless I make a mistake and a chapter doesn't get published at that set time-
Anyways-!
Hope you enjoyed this random thing I made! See you all next weekend with the next two chapters!
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(Word count: 498)
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The American's kids
FanfictionI have no idea why I did this- I made a country that helps America with their states, don't ask- America, a lazy, stupid, fat country to the others. Little do the countries know their a single parent to 50 states, 14 territories, a capital, and an e...