On the Way Down

Chapter Twenty-Three

U still in town or r u back in L.A.?

My gut feeling is to ignore the text from Torin that CarPlay reads to me as I steer my car onto Hollywood Way, leaving the Burbank airport in the distance. Monday morning has been challenging enough after leaving my weekend in Vegas, getting on a plane, and landing back in my L.A. reality, and it isn't because of the geographic distance that's once more between Phoenix and me.

He requested a do-over when we drove to Willow Beach on Saturday. The evening turned out to be a peaceful escape from how our weekend began, and it erased my thoughts of Len and my concerns about how Phoenix was handling the news from the moment we pushed away from the shore in our kayak. Nothing could have been more romantic than paddling together as we watched the sunset, or sitting hand-in-hand by a crackling bonfire, or kayaking back under the moonlight and stars. Then there was the sweet simplicity of yesterday, waking up to rumbling thunder while sheets of rain fell from the sky. We stayed curled up under a blanket indoors, watching movies and eating takeout and simply existing. I should be, as Ava once observed, "all glowy and shit" today, and still the rose-tinged hue of the weekend has already faded to a bittersweet tarnish I've yet to let myself analyze.

It could be fatigue, and I told myself I was just tired while I sat in the window seat on the plane, staring out at the landscape below during the quick flight home. Lord knows sleep isn't something I had in abundance this weekend, which is a valid reason for why I should put off answering Torin. I'm not sure I'm physically or emotionally equipped right now to rehash Friday night or to get into another disagreement about Phoenix and his presence in my life while I'm running on fumes.

But Torin has been my friend and protector since well before I knew Phoenix. He has always had my back, and he and Ava took care of me when I was at my lowest point. The thought of leaving things with tension between us winds my insides into more knots than the news about Len did on Saturday. For this reason, and this reason alone, I dictate a reply to his message.

Driving home from the airport. It was good to see you this weekend.

My phone immediately rings. Of course it does. I just told Torin I'm in my car, so he knows I'm not busy with anything other than driving and that it's unlikely I'm already on the phone with someone else.

"Hey," I answer.

"Hi. Happy you're home safe."

There are a couple of ways I could take that, whether it's that my flight landed safely, or the perspective I assume he has that I'm back in L.A. and not with Phoenix. I opt for the former and don't question it, mostly because I'd like to restore the peace between us.

"It was a little windy leaving Vegas, but when isn't it? I hope Ava's flight is smoother."

I actually don't know if Ava flew to Vegas or drove, or when she's coming home, but it gives me something to say that seems relatively safe. A part of me hopes that keeping this a surface-level conversation and not diving into our conflicting points of view about my love life will smooth things over. We can both move on and avoid talking about Phoenix and me. It's probably for the best if Torin chooses to ignore our relationship for now, and if I ignore his anger about it, and we land on an unspoken truce.

"Sorry to hear about the flight, but I'm relieved you're home and far away from whatever mind manipulation Phoenix has done on you."

So much for the truce. Torin must not feel the same way I do about tiptoeing around the topic or playing nice.

"Excuse me?"

"We should talk, Del. Like, really talk."

"It sounds like some talking already happened. Did you really say you'd take out Phoenix's kneecaps with your drum sticks?"