Harry Potter One Shots

Back to the Dursleys - Harry

TW ⚠️
Nightmares, PTSD, Suicidal thoughts, Bullying

Harry got of the platform and said bye to his friends. Hermione made him promise to write to her at least once a week and tell her if anything is wrong. Harry felt like this wasn't necessary but he appreciated it. Harry started walking towards where he thought Uncle Vernon would be with his car. He started thinking about how Cedric would never get to step of platform 9 3/4 again, but he tried to push those thoughts away. He hoped he wasn't still angry with him about the Dudley being tricked into eating wizard candy thing, but knowing him, he probably is. Vernon didn't say anything to him while in the car, which both made him nervous and happy. Nervous because he knew Vernon would just explode at him at some point and happy because he didn't have to deal with that right then.

When they got back to number 4 Privet drive Harry was immediately told to go to his room, to which he obliged. He'd much rather be alone right now then be with those people. The minute he got into his room he face planted onto the bed. He knew he'd have to get out of his bed soon to go do some chore Dudley was supposed to have done yesterday, but right now he needed to lay down. He hadn't gotten a good nights sleep in a while, and he didn't think he would ever again so he should take every chance he got to rest, but he didn't. He was haunted by the image of the green light and the yellow and black badger boy. Every time he closed his eyes he saw him. Every time he was left alone for more then a few minutes he started thinking about the graveyard.

He was correct in his assumption that he'd have to get up to do something, turns out this time it was doing the dishes and then making dinner. Apparently Dudley wanted breakfast for dinner because he only got a piece of toast for breakfast since he didn't do the grocery shopping. Harry was making scrambled eggs with beans, sausage and toast, a meal he made lots of times before, if you asked him last year he could've made it with his eyes closed, but he kept losing focus, so the eggs were over cooked, and the sausage and toast were burnt. The beans were the only acceptable part of the meal, or, well, the tomatoes were to but they were raw so that doesn't count. To say his aunt and uncle were disappointed would be an understatement. Harry was sent back to his room without dinner after being lectured. That was okay, he didn't really have an appetite anyway, and their words didn't hurt him anymore. He didn't think they even could at this point.

He was laying on the ground spasming in indescribable pain. Just as he finally got some relief he was hit with yet another curse. When that one stopped he still felt as though he'd been shot and stabbed all over, and he heard the men around him laughing. Something made Harry's head forcefully turn towards them, and he saw his friend Cedric on the ground, with a death eater stopping him from getting his wand that was just out of reach. Harry feared what would happen. He nearly threw up when he saw Cedric compulsing on the ground, screaming in agony. It was the worst sound he'd ever heard, and he'd heard a basilisk in the walls whispering about wanting to murder people. Cedric got a break but then the wand was aimed back at him, and Harry begged that they'd leave his friend alone, it was him they wanted. They didn't listen to him though, they just laughed at him, then a green light shot out of Voldemorts wand, with the words "Avada kedavra" and he just screamed "no". Then he heard a load bang on his right and he shot up and he grabbed his wand.

"SHUT UP POTTER! IM TRYING TO SLEEP!" His cousin screamed, probably waking his parents up. He looked around in a panic before realizing that it was just a dream.

"Sorry Dudley, didn't mean to wake you." He answered. He put his glasses on turned the lights on. He didn't want to go back to sleep now, so he looked at the time and it was 4:02 am, late enough to wake up, he thought. He looked down at himself and saw that his shirt was drenched in sweat, but he was still freezing cold. He tried not to think about the dream he just had but couldn't stop, and just thinking back to hit he was in so much pain, and he just started sobbing quietly. When the mental and physical anguish he knew would come back lessened slightly he managed to stop. He looked at the time again, 5:16 am. Time to be productive, he decided. He sat down at his desk and grabbed a quill and parchment and started writing to Hermoine and Sirius.

"Hey Snuffles! How are you doing?
The Dursleys are charming as usual.
I just woke up from another nightmare. They're getting worse somehow. I was feeling the pain i felt that night, all of it, I was shaking and cold sweating. It felt as if I was there again.
Have you got any news on Voldemort? Are everyone okay?
I miss you. When are we meeting up again? I understand that it's hard with him out there but we could put up some protective charms or something, we'll figure it out.
Regards Harry."
He didn't feel as though it accurately portrayed how he felt but he didn't want to bother his god father more then he already had. Then he moved on to a letter to Hermione.
"Hey 'Moine!
How are you and your parents? Have you told them yet, and if so, how did they take the news of his return?
I'm doing okay, but I'm having nightmares and feeling distracted. I burnt dinner last night because of it.
Do you have any clue on when we're going to the Burrow? I'm already missing both of you.
How's Ron doing? I need a friend with me so I don't want Hedwig to be away for too long, and he lives quite a bit away.
Regards Harry."
He decided that was enough to tell her. He told Sirius about the pain so he told someone, Hermione couldn't complain, and he didn't want to bother her when she couldn't do anything about it. He tied the letters to Hedwig and told her to take them to Sirius and Hermione.

When it was eight o'clock Harry went out and into the kitchen. He decided to make breakfast for his relatives to make up for ruining the food yesterday. It turned out okay this time, and it was ready for when Vernon came to eat. He yelled at him for wasting food yesterday when he was obviously capable of doing it. He asked Harry what the fuck was wrong with him, and Harry decided not to answer. He could only try not to cry when he thought about "what the fuck" that was "wrong" with him. Vernon could she that he was tearing up and told him to man up. Dudley got down a while later and complained about Harry waking him up.

"In the middle of the night he starts moaning about some guy! Like who does that!" He told his father.

"I'm sorry it just-" Harry started to try and defend himself but was interrupted. He guessed that was probably for the best, he didn't want to tell them.

"It -its j-jus-just" Dudley mocked him stumbling over his sentence. "Like just shut up! And especially about Cedric!" He continued. Harry felt himself get angry. His eyes darkened and he felt venom in his voice.

"DO NOT TALK ABOUT HIM! DON'T EVEN MENTION HIM!" Harry shouted back. Dudley jumped backwards a bit.

"YOU WILL NOT TALK BAVK TO MY SON IN MY HOUSE!" Vernon shouted back at him. Dudley chuckled a bit when Harry didn't respond but just glared at them instead. He then went to grab food but "bumped" into Harry's side and said.

"Guess Cedric is a sore spot!"

Harry continued to get those nightmares. They were never the same so he could never prepare for what was about to come. All he knew was that he hated it. Every time he heard a loud noise he'd jump. After a while he decided he just wouldn't sleep, but ten days later he fainted from exhaustion while vacuuming. After that he slept at least two hours every night, but he hated every second of it. The started thinking about just not existing anymore. Dudley's taunts mixed with his lack of sleep, paranoia and pain just made him want to die. He even thought about grabbing a knife and taking it up to his room at one point, but he didn't do anything with it. He needed to stop Voldemort so he couldn't do that, it wouldn't be fair to anyone else and he couldn't afford to be selfish. He was happy to know both Ron and Hermione missed him, but they didn't share any news with him. He wished they did, but they probably just thought he wasn't stable enough to hear anything.

One day he had enough with Dudley after he taunted Cedric and his mum, so he pulled his wand at him. Dudley was terrified and was paralyzed but his awful friends just laughed at it. Suddenly everything went cold and all hope of a better future Harry had just vanished. Two dementors came after him and Dudley. The rest is history.

1635 words