rule of three. [saltburn]

sept.

xxx.

chapter sept.
seven.

xxx.

          Listening to Oliver talk about the phone call he received from his mother was grating for Nick. At first, he was beyond pissed at him for throwing the door open without knocking; not because he cared if Oliver saw or not, he could really not care less what he thought, but because he didn't want Felix to stop. But when he began to tell them that his father had passed, it became an entirely different situation for Nick.

            Nick tried to sit there, his knees pulled to his chest as he stared at the floor, trying to separate himself from the situation, but he couldn't. He eventually rose to his feet and left the room, hearing Oliver start to apologize to Felix before the door swung shut behind him. He struggled to dig his phone out of his pocket as his heart raced, chest heaving as he began hyperventilating.

            It all happened so quickly, he wasn't really sure what specifically Oliver had said that set this off in him, but he didn't care. Nick couldn't slow his breathing as he walked down the corridor, his hand trembled when he finally managed to get his phone out and started to type his sister's number in. This hasn't happened to Nick in months, and whenever it did happen, it was in the safety of the Kim-Roth home where his sister could sit with him until he calmed down.

" Answer the phone, Nell, " Nick murmured to himself, and he suddenly stopped as he reached the staircase at the end of the corridor. No one ever took the stairs when there was a working elevator, so he knew he'd be left alone. He flung the door open and all but crashed to the floor. His phone kept ringing as he knelt on the ground, pressing his free hand against the wall, " Please, Nell, "

" Nick? What's wrong? " She asked, mostly because he'd called her three times in a matter of five minutes, but also a little because of her 'twin-tuition'. She could hear the shakiness in his breath before he even spoke.

           " I can't—I can't..I.." He couldn't breathe, sucking in and out so fast he couldn't get any words out of his mouth. Nick sank further into the floor and leaned his forehead on the wall, clutching his hand to his chest, " I can't breathe, Nell. "

          " It's okay, you're okay, Nick, " Her voice crackled a little but it became clearer the more she spoke, " breathe, Nick, okay? Just take some deep breaths for me. "

          She kept repeating her reassurances and whatnot, the same sort of things she would say when he would have a panic attack or hyperventilate at home. She would drag him into their shared bedroom and sit him down, hold his hands and make him breathe with her. As they grew, it felt more ridiculous to think about, but from time to time he still needed it today. He would always need his sister regardless.

xxx.

         The end of semester ball had approached quicker than Nick had anticipated, but his concentration might've been skewed elsewhere and made it hard for him to keep track of the days leading up to it. He stood away from the rest of the attendees, as per usual, leaning against the brick wall as he watched people stroll back and forth across the courtyards in their fancy gowns and pristine tuxes.

        His sister, in particular, was directly across from him, talking with Jade and a few other girls, her light blue dress standing out amongst a dozen dark, neutral hues. She was beautiful, not just because she was dressed up and had silver jewelry decorating her neck and wrists, but it was just in the moment that he realized he probably didn't tell her that enough.