Lost in Confusion

Chapter 1

It was a breezy fall night as I walked with my boyfriend Brody down the deserted streets of Tulsa. For a fall night it was utterly cold. I had only worn a pair of bell-bottoms with a t-shirt. My boyfriend Brody had noticed by now that I was cold since we've been walking for some time. I sometimes wished he was the kind of guy who would offer his jacket and open doors but he just wasn't. Over the past two years I had gotten used to Brody's personality he just wasn't that type of guy. As we walked I tried to warm myself up but it was no use. Brody turned to me and said, "Grace are you cold?". I replied to him with a simple yes to which he replied "I told you, you should've dressed warmer for tonight". Which I knew but I was in a rush to get ready and partially to get out of the house and away from my brothers and their friends. I figured I would've been fine since we were just going to a party one of Brody's friends had thrown and we weren't far from my house. When I didn't reply Brody stopped for a second and said "Grace is something wrong, you seem to be thinking about something?". I replied with a no and Brody dropped it. But I was thinking about a lot of things, when did I not. 

As I saw my house full of laughter and noise I was filled with dread. Don't get me wrong I loved my brothers and their friends but tonight I wasn't in the mood for anything. The party with Brody was eventful to say the least. As usual it was just greasers including Brody's gang. It was crowded which didn't bother me much I was used to crowded. At these types of parties Brody was always so absorbed with his friends. I always felt as though I was lost or just not there. Don't get me wrong Brody is a great boyfriend and I love him but as all men do he had a big ego and his friends fed that. Tonight he wasn't as bad as usual he didn't drink much tonight but he still was absorbed in hanging out with his friends. As I wandered off into a corner talking to Angela, one of the Shepard's sister I heard a commotion. When I looked in the direction of the commotion I saw some of Brody's friends fighting with a couple guys. Nothing was really out of the ordinary about that, this happened all the time at these kind of parties. Until one of the guys started getting too rough to which Brody stepped in to stop the fight. As I approached the now over fight just to check in with Brody he turned to look at me and smiled, "Grace where've you been I missed you". These words were odd coming from Brody's mouth since he wasn't the type to show his emotions like that. I responded, "I was just talking to Angela when I saw the fight break out". He looked at me and said "Oh yeah, those guys were ticked off because one of their girls has been hanging around one of the guys in the gang". I looked at him and just said, "Well it's a good thing you broke it up it looked like it was getting nasty". Brody looked at me with a smile and said, "Yeah it was, how about you and me get out of here it's getting late". I was confused as first since it felt like we had just gotten here until I realized it was already eleven. So I agreed and we left. 

As we approached the gate we both stopped. Brody gave me a hug and kiss and said, "I was thinking tomorrow me and you could go see a movie I know tonight was a drag". I looked up at him with a smile and said, "That sounds great, I'll see you tomorrow". He gave me another kiss and said, "I'll pick you up at 6, goodnight Grace, I love you". I smiled up at him and said, "Goodnight Brody, I love you too". I watched him walk away he had on a black leather jacket and his black hair was greased back. I was sad to see him walk away even though sometimes he wasn't the best he was still my favorite person. As he disappeared into the night I pushed open the gate and walked up the steps to my house. As I approached I heard the tv and all the boys laughing and having a good time. I pushed open the door and all the boys looked at me briefly. Darry my older brother smiled and said, "Hey Gracie, how was your night with Brody?". I smiled at Darry and said "It was good we had a nice night". I didn't mention the fight at the party because Darry didn't like me being around stuff like that. Even though I was 17 he still saw me as his little sister which I didn't mind I liked that Darry cared. Darry smiled sweetly and said, "Good I'm glad". As I looked around I saw my brother Sodapop playing cards with his friends Dallas, Steve, and Two-bit. I looked towards the couch and saw my younger brother Ponyboy and his friend Johnny reading  a book together as usual. As I sat down at the table next to all the boys playing cards Sodapop looked up and smiled, "Hey Gracie, how was your night with Brody did you have fun?". Two-bit butted in with a grin saying "Yeah Gracie did you have fun?". To which I replied by slapping him on the shoulder and saying, "Yes we had a nice night". Two-bit was always joking around like that and to top it off he was drunk as usual. I looked across the table at Dallas. He looked up at me with a non-genuine smile and said, "How is Brody anyway?". Dallas and I were quite close you could say he was a good friend of mine. I replied saying, "He's good. Why?". Dallas looked up from his cards and at me with somewhat of a smirk and said, "No reason". Dallas never liked Brody. I wasn't sure why, I could never quite put my finger on why he didn't. I always thought it was just guys being guys but all the other boys got along with Brody just fine. After that I announced to the guys that I was tired and was going to get ready for bed. 

I walked up the stairs to my room. As I was getting into my pajamas that were passed down to me from my mother I heard a knock on my door. I walked to the door and opened it and was met with Dallas. He walked into my room and sat down on my bed. I looked at him and said, "What's up Dallas?". He looked at me and said, "Just wanted to see how you were doing.". I looked at him with a soft smile and said, "I'm doing good Dallas, how's everything with you?". He looked at me with his sad eyes and said, "I'm alright, I broke up with Sylvia she was cheating on me again". Sylvia was Dallas' on and off girlfriend she always seemed to be cheating on him but then again Dallas wasn't perfect either. She seemed like an alright girl I just think Dallas brought out the worst in her. I looked at Dallas with sympathy and said, "I'm sorry Dallas, don't worry you'll find another girl". He glanced up at me briefly, looked down and said, "Yeah I know, it's whatever". I sensed something else was bothering him so I asked, "Dallas is something else bothering you?". He looked at me for a second with softness in his eyes and said, "No, I can't and don't wanna talk about it.". He seemed to be angry, "Are you sure Dallas?". He snapped at me, "I said I don't wanna talk about it". I just looked at him for a second and said, "Ok Dallas I didn't mean to push the subject". He then looked at me and apologized to which I said, "It's alright". I then told him I had an early shift tomorrow at the hospital and needed to get some sleep. After I told him that he left saying, "Goodnight Gracie, get some sleep I'll see you tomorrow". 

As I laid in my bed that night I could not stop thinking. I was thinking about Brody and how I was excited to see him for our date tomorrow. But I was also thinking about Dallas and why he snapped at me like that. Not many things could get under Dallas' skin. I decided to just let it be. Dallas always knew if he needed someone to talk to he could talk to me or Johnny. We were the only ones he was really close with. As I was thinking I drifted off into a deep sleep not looking forward to getting up early tomorrow for work but I had no choice.