Finally, Home.

Sneha PoV

Work began, honestly being in consulting was already one hell of a job, speaking Korean made it tougher. Thankfully the team under me is well-versed in English. But still - 

Do I really have to be this big girl in the city, this independence costs a lot. Aghhhh, I need a drink. Oh, it's Friday? Weekend already - yay. I can drink today - yay. Oh, thinking of drinks, I owe him - for that night. Agh, why would I embarrass myself in front of my neighbour? Who happens to be the biggest artist right now? I need to look at my drinking habits. Okay from tomorrow onwards - I am not drinking! Today I will, because I think I deserve it.
So I should have booze—whiskey and some snacks.

I met him again while waiting for the lift. What is this sorcery? Why do we meet at the oddest times?
I smile, I don't want it to get awkward, "Hi, Long time! What's up?"
He looked up and smiled as he saw me. Oh. And then continued, "Hi, been pretty busy! What about you, How are you?"
I sigh, "Don't ask."
And I show him the packet, "This is a need today, I feel like I can die any second now."
He laughs," Drinking habits on point!" 

I laugh, "Cannot help it, I mean I am not a drunkard."                                                                                      He clarifies, "I am not implying that. Sorry if that's rude." I chuckle, "Oh please don't be. It wasn't." He finally smiles a little, "I was actually gonna ask you if you don't mind. Do you wanna drink together?"

I, we what? I try to smile and not show my true reaction, "Umm, honestly I don't. So, your place or mine?"
He says, "My place"
And I get a deja vu, I think I have heard him say this before. He asks, "What are we drinking then?"
"I have whiskey and beers and snacks. So, I think we are set."

We reach his place and I don't see Bam, I ask, "Where's Bam?"
He says, " Oh he's at my parents' place. Make yourself comfortable."
"Yeah sure but it's kinda overwhelming not gonna lie."
He smiles, "Can understand it but Chill."
Then he brings in the whiskey while I open the snacks.
I smile and say, "The weekend looks good now!"
He says, "You like drinking?"
I say, "Yeah actually, just for the right high. You?"
He replies, " I love having a good drink and sometimes a smoke here and there."
I say, "But I need a company for both, I cannot just sit and do it."
He smiles, "Umm, I like having someone around, but having a drink alone is a pleasure beyond explanation."
A smile forms on my face, "I know this feeling, When I have my coffee just by myself it feels good like somehow rewarding, you know!!"
He smiles wide, "Exactly!"
To continue our conversation, "Is work super busy for you? Now that you are all together again?"
He smiles, "It is busy, but I missed this feeling, of working together & super hectic schedules. Once you get habitual to that, it seems like the only way."
"Makes sense. I wonder if I will ever get that feeling you know."
He adds, "Like what?"
"Like work is natural for you, you want to give it your all and not complain about it. "
He says, " I think nobody feels that. You can learn to feel that way but it doesn't come naturally to you."
I say, "Does it not come to people who live for their work?"
He smiles, "Probably it does. I don't know, I had to learn it. That kind of passion is something else."
I add, "I am jealous of such people and even you."
He asks, "Why?"
I say, " This might sound silly. But I want to be someone who loves what they do. Like honestly I don't. If I made a list of all the things that excite me, I wouldn't even think of the word Consult. I so need to get out of this. Ugh Sorry, for ranting."
He smiles and clinks our now-filled glasses, "It's to you then."
Oh, to me? Our first drink together.

He asks, "Anyways so, how old are you?"
I laugh, " Umm, 25."
He looks at me shocked, "You are 25?"
"I know I look older, but this did damage my pride a little bit."
He laughs, "Oh no no, I meant like You are like younger than me, not that you look older."
I laugh, "Lol, there's no need to explain that much."
He laughs, and I think He looks umm, good? Ofc, He is Jungkook!!
Suddenly he passes me the plate and says, "You should eat something with it."
I almost laugh, " Yes. Random thought, this reminded me of the time when I had a drink with my brother. He was like this too!"
What am I even saying? Am I getting drunk? It's just 3 drinks. Brother, seriously? What the hell!
He says, "Are you calling me your brother?"
I explain, "No. No, never. But for that one second, I was reminded of that time."
He says, "This is the first time I am taking care of a younger one, so it's new."
I laugh, "Younger one seriously?"
He says, "Which you are."
"As you say then, oldie."
He laughs, and I realise, I have known him so long but not known him at all.
I say, "You know It feels like you are a different person altogether. Not the Jungkook who was my bias wrecker but like in a good way."
He smiled, " I will take that as a compliment but Why am I the wrecker? Who's your bias?"
"Can you guess?"
He says, "Ummm, umm, Taehyungie Hyung?"
And I am shocked, that was apt.
He smiles, "So I am right."
I reply shocked, " He is. Like he is the man."
He asks, "You want to meet him?"
"Nope no never."
I cannot even think straight.
"But why?"
I hope I am not blushing, "Because I will be on the floor. He is like the Kim Taehyung. I...I might pass out you know?"
Somehow he isn't smiling anymore, "But you met me just fine?"
I smiled, " That was a coincidence this whole neighbour thing is so bizarre. I never thought I would meet you again. But here we are, getting drunk!"
He smiles a little.
I ask, "So, How did you guess my bias?"
He smiles, "Umm it's like you both have similar vibes and that peace I feel."
I reply shocked, "We have the same vibe? We as in Me and KTH?"
He laughed, "Yeah you kind of do. I can now see you are so swooned for him."
I blushed a little, "That I am, he is like the gold standard."
"That is something he would be glad to know."
"As long as he doesn't know I said it."
The conversation went on, with more glasses of whiskey and more packets of snacks.

Somehow we are now talking about our lives, and why I left my home. It sounds so depressing if I put it like this, I mean.
"So why did you leave?"
I smile, " I've been trying to go home my whole life—"(Chelsea Dingman )
He looked confused, and I explained further.
"I was home, but not at home. I have been living alone for a long time now, but I guess I never came home, it was just different places. And leaving was again my attempt to finally find my home."
He replies, "But your home is in you."
" I know I am the only one who gonna be always there for me. But for once, I want to feel at home. Like when we used to in our childhood, someone is waiting for us. Someone who makes a home. If not someone, Home is where peace is. A sense of belonging. I don't know if it's a person or me, but I want to feel at home."
He thinks for a while and says, " Someone who makes you feel at home, It is tough to find. You need to feel at home, with you and then maybe with someone too."
I laughed, "I know and my single ass is aware of that."
He laughs, "Mine is too. Do you always add these English phrases in your conversations?"
"English comes naturally to me, like my mother tongue."
He smiles, "Teach me then!"
I laugh, "Okay done. So, Classes from Next Week?"
He smiles, "Yeah, I would like that. Wait, give me your number so that you don't go back on your words!"
I laugh, "Dang, I will not. Here, add yours too."
And one more drink is finished.
I am kind of drunk and so is he, I hope he is too.
I ask, "So, how was leaving your life behind for you?"
He looks at me, "Oh. Tough, I guess. I knew I had to come to terms with it and I had to leave. I guess, even when we (members) were having discussions about it, deciding everything it didn't hit me. It caught up to me when Seokjin Hyung left. And one by one all of them left. It was weird but I had to come to terms with it. Thankfully, I had Jiminie Hyung with me there. It was good too like the experiences were new. Ahh, yeah. It was tough, but it is over now."
I smile, "You're Home now."
He smiles, "Yes, I am Home."
He laughs, "I am hungry. Ah, I want some Ramen. But it is late!"
"So what? Please make some for me too." I try to say this politely.
He suddenly smiles brightly, "Yes! Ahh! Okay! Ramen for Two. You will love this new recipe, I can guarantee."
Looking at him, I smiled a lot bigger than usual. It was like he was just waiting for me to say that. I know for sure, I will love it.
While he is making some ramen, in God knows what recipe, He looks extremely focused.
I laugh and ask, "Are you always this focused?"
He says, "Food should taste perfect, always."
I say, " From here on, whenever we meet, you are the one who's cooking."
He smiles, "Sure, Madam!"
I laugh, "Ah Haan. Also, if you don't mind can I ask you something?"
He looks up, "Sure!"
"You are single? Why?"
He laughs, "What's a Why? I just didn't find a girl who felt like home you know."
I laugh, "I see what you did there. But seriously why?"
"I guess I never found the one, I don't know."
I say, "Ugh, same story."
He laughs. I ask another silly question that's been bugging me, "Also what should I address you as?"
"Anything."
I laugh, "Would You prefer Oppa?"
He makes this face, and I laugh, "Probably Not."
He suddenly looks up and says, "Jungkook?"
I say, "But you are 3 years older than me, Jungkook-ssi?"
He says, "No, Just Jungkook is fine."
I smile, " Jungkook it is."
He finally smiles, "Yes."

And the conversation went on, while we had ramen and some more drinks. We talked about our past relationships and their endings. He told me how his work was always his top number one, plus some incidents from the military service. I told him about the corporate world. Our trajectory of lives was so different, probably that's what made them more interesting to talk about. We were talking about BTS, and their relationships with each other as brothers (or family). It was so beautiful, their lives together were so beautifully woven together.
My drunk self who has taken over the driver's seat says, "I have a confession."
"What?"
I confess, " I shipped You and Taehyung. I am the biggest believer in TaeKook. But since you are single, and you guys are practically family. It seems this is not the case. Agh, you both looked so cute together!"
He asks, "Like as a couple?"
I say, "Of course. I believed in TaeKook Supremacy!"
He laughs, "Oh okay, now you know. If it helps, we are close."
"No, it doesn't but it's not my place to say anything."
He smiled, "Yes, Ms. Drunk."
I am drunk because the sober me couldn't ask a question like this. And my eyes they want to rest.
He says something, I don't understand.
Jungkook asks, "You wanna sleep?"
" Yeah, I think should leave. I had fun!" And then I mumbled something while standing up.
He smiles, "I did too. Good night."
I smiled, "Yes, Good night."
As I left, He came to drop me off at my door.
I laughed, "I can walk just fine, Don't you worry."
He laughed, "I can see that."
"Huh, Bye. See you."
He did that smile, the shy one, "Bye."

It filled my heart, He is a really good guy. And we are like friends or something now, which I am really happy about. He was the first person I had met who made me enjoy conversation, in the same irrational and sensuous way I enjoyed coffee or loud music. (Sally Rooney)
Ummm, I need water...