Born To Die - The 63rd Annual Hunger Games

Chapter 4

Song I listened to the most this chapter: betty - Taylor Swift 🛹

Me and Amethyst didn't talk much at breakfast. Neither of us really knew what to say after last night. I know it wasn't the time to be thinking of that, but why did I just let her kiss me? We're still avoiding each other at training. She's back at the archery station, and I'm at the knives. I keep my eye on Maisie, but I don't notice anything new. Still better keep an eye on her.

I try to focus on my training, but I can't stop thinking about what happened with Amethyst. I can't think about love right now, I have to focus on winning. But why does it bother me so much? And what about Peridot? If, no when, I get home, would she even want me back? But how would she know about Amethyst? She doesn't have to know we kissed. She doesn't have to know anything. I notice I've already missed several targets. Have I really been that distracted? I did spears for a little while after lunch while trying not to think of Amethyst or Peridot.

Dinner is unusually quiet, which really doesn't help. As soon as we're done eating I went off to my room. Not long after, someone knocked on the door. I got up to check. "Hey Amethyst." "Hey, maybe we should talk about what happened last night. I'm sorry I kissed you." "It's okay. I guess I'm just confused about Peridot. I feel like I'm still in love with her but I just don't know." "I understand. Maybe we should just talk."

Amethyst sits down next to me on my bed. "How did you get that scar?" "My dad. He hit me with a glass bottle one time when he was angry at my sister. I got in the way when he tried to hit her with it and it cut me up pretty bad." "I'm sorry." "It's okay, I'm used to it." Amethyst looked somewhat horrified at what I'd said. "Are you okay Gloss?" "I'm fine with taking the punches if it means he doesn't hurt Cashmere, he's always going to be angry and I'm not gonna let him take it out on her." "You would do that for your sister?" "I have to." I remembered after dad hit me with the bottle, when Cashmere was sitting on the bathroom floor sobbing as she bandaged up my cut because she felt like it was her fault.

I thought about the promise I made to my sister before I left for the Capitol. Cashmere, one of the only people I know for sure I love. Amethyst rests her head on my shoulder. But I couldn't stop thinking of home. Who will she have if I don't come back? I know she has mom and Velvet, and Onyx promised me he'd look after them, but that leaves the problems of dad and Archer. I'd never seen Archer lay a hand on her, but I knew his reputation, so surely it was only a matter of time, I'd seen how controlling he could be.

"Are you close to your sister?" I ask Amethyst. "Not at all, Satin can't stand me. I doubt she'd even care if I didn't come back." "Don't say that." "It's true Gloss. She doesn't even know me at all. I just wish she loved me the way you love your sister. You and Cashmere are so close and Satin doesn't care about me at all." "I'm sorry Amethyst." "It's okay. It's just, you have so many people counting on you to win. Your mom, your sister, your friends, and who do I have?"

"Amethyst.." "I volunteered because I wanted to prove myself to my family and everyone at school. I don't really have anything to lose. You have so many people who love you and are looking to you, and I don't have anyone who would care if I came back." I don't even think twice before I kiss her. What am I doing? She puts her hand on my cheek and kisses me back. I pulled her into my lap as she continued kissing me. The sound of someone knocking on my door caused us to break apart. "Amethyst? Are you in here?" "Goodnight Gloss." "Goodnight Amethyst." Amethyst follows Quartz out of the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts. What was I thinking? Why am I doing this? Not just to her but to myself. What will happen if it comes down to the two of us? I mean in a few short weeks, one, or even both of us, will be dead. I try not to think of that and eventually fall asleep.

After lunch today, we'd have our individual sessions with the Gamemakers. Our training scores are important to draw in sponsors, which could mean the difference between life and death. I had been a little distracted by what happened with Amethyst but I couldn't let that get in the way of my training. Being the male from District 1, I'd be first. The other tributes are quiet, some of them talking to each other. "District 1. Gloss Tanner. Please report for individual assessment." "Good luck." Amethyst said as I walked away. "You too." The Gamemakers look up when I walk in. "You may begin." I immediately go for the knives. They watch me throws knives for a few minutes. "You're dismissed."After another 15 minutes Amethyst has returned. "How'd it go?" "Pretty good."

In a few hours, after dinner, we'd get to see our training scores. "Amethyst Johanson, District 1, 9!" "A 9? That's great!" She said. "Gloss Tanner, District 1, 9!" "A 9 should impress the sponsors. Nice job kid." Bronze said. Iris scores an 8, and I have to wonder what she showed the Gamemakers. James only scores an 8. District 2 are normally the biggest threats, but this year doesn't seem to be the case. "Maeve Bernard, District 3, 8!" An 8? I noticed her in training but she didn't seem to be skilled in any weapons. What was she hiding?

Marin scores a 10, I'll need to watch out for her. Jay gets a 9, the same as me. Mostly 5s and 6s, the girl from 8 only gets a 4, then Maisie scores a 9? She's definitely a threat. I'll know to watch out for her in the arena. And if possible, eliminate her first. Tomorrow, we'd prepare for our interviews, our final chance to make an impression on the Capitol and earn sponsors. "Off to bed you two! You have a big day tomorrow!" Fefe said.