My Professor

16. Concern

Theodore and I returned to the parking lot at what felt like too soon that day, even though it was dusk by the time we reached my car. I'd had so much fun with him throughout the day and I wasn't ready for it to end.

"I guess this is goodbye," I said.

"For now," he said. "I'll see you on Monday."

"In class," I said. "Does that even count?"

"Stop by my office."

"You have other students," I reminded him. "I can't hog all of your time."

"I'd rather see you a little than not at all," he replied. "It's rare if I catch sight of you during class. The room is huge."

"I'll try to sit closer to the front," I told him. "Unless you think that'd be too obvious."

"Try the second or third row," he suggested.

"I'll get a spot right in the middle," I smiled. "You won't be able to miss me."

"I would love that," he said, leaning in to kiss me.

My heart fluttered in my chest, as it always did when he kissed me.

"I'll see you on Monday," I said.

"Okay. Drive safe on your way home."

"I will," I promised.

"Goodnight, Indigo," he smiled.

"Goodnight."

Class was much more interesting with the increased eye contact with Theodore. I tried to hide my smile throughout the lecture but I struggled. I felt so giddy and alive. What an exciting turn my life had taken and I was desperate to see where things would go.

The rest of my school day crawled by as I waited to see Theodore again. I was patient and I waited until the tail end of his office hours before stopping by. Just as I'd hoped, he was alone, sitting behind his desk.

"Indigo. Hey," Theodore smiled at me.

I sat in a chair across his desk. "Hi," I beamed back. I always loved seeing him, no matter what the circumstances were.

"I'm glad you stopped by. How are you?" he asked.

"I'm good," I said, leaning back in my seat. "And you?"

"I'm good. I was just about to wrap up office hours. Quite a few people came in today; I've been busy."

"I guess I caught you at the right time, then," I said.

"You did," he said, pushing aside a stack of paper on his desk. "Anything exciting going on?"

"Not particularly," I said. "I think my friend is trying to set me up on another date with one of her frat friends, but she hasn't said anything explicitly yet."

"Another?"

"Have I not mentioned that?" I asked, regretting that I brought it up.

"No," he replied. "Though I suppose you didn't have to."

"Yeah, a really good friend of mine wanted me to get out of my shell and actually try to go on a date. She thought she was being helpful when she roped me into it because obviously she doesn't know about you."

"Oh. Well. You and I aren't officially together, so if you want to see other people, of course you should."
I shook my head. "But, I don't."

"Selfishly, I'm glad to hear this," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"I think the right thing to do would be to let you go, allow you the opportunity to see people you age."

"If I wanted to see people my age I wouldn't done that by now. Clearly I'm not interested." I wasn't happy that he was trying to push me away, but I understood why he felt that way.

"That's true," he mused.

"If this isn't worth it to you, you don't have to see me Theodore," I said. "I can leave you alone."

"That's not it, Indy," he replied. "Not at all."

"Then what is it?"

"I worry I'm holding you back," he confessed. "You could be with anyone, and yet you risk yourself to be with me."

"I think you're risking more than I am," I told him. "And I think anyone is generous. I'm not exactly the most sought after person when I enter a room." I couldn't help but think of Maria, who was always the center of attention, always the most desired out of the two of us. "I'm a wallflower. I melt into the wall. I assure you, I'm not missing out on anything."

"If you insist."

"I do. Now, stop feeling sorry for yourself," I smiled. "You're worrying about nothing."

"Alright," he said, returning my smile. "I'll take your word for it."

"You better," I teased. I pulled out my phone and checked the time. "I should probably go. I don't want to keep you here all night."

"I should go, too," he said. "Get a move on with my night."

I stood, as did he, and we collected our bags. We walked toward the door, pausing by the frosted glass window embedded in it.
Theodore looked at me for a moment, studying me, before pulling me into his arms and kissing me passionately. I wrapped my arms around his neck and reciprocated fervently.

After a moment, we broke apart, releasing each other and taking several steps back.

"We shouldn't do this here," Theodore said.

"I know," I said, trying to slow my breath.

"We shouldn't be doing this at all."

"I think we're past that," I said..

Theodore paused for a moment. "Will you meet me tonight?"

"Yes, anywhere."

"Okay," he said. "Let's meet at the Italian restaurant we ran into each other a few months back."

"Okay," I agreed. "I'll see you there."