Short Stories

Missing - Drop_Of_Inspiration

Title: Missing
Category: Poetry, Non-Fiction
Weird geeky author: Drop_Of_Inspiration
Credits: jess19365 for being the incredible friend this whole thing is written for, and cacigrace, Honey_Fall and TheLeopardOfSnow for being the other friends mentioned (Mush, Ding and Shong <3). We love you, Jessic!
Btw: Kk, fine. E, not C. Happy now? Gee.
- Iz xx

Something's missing
Something's gone
Something feels like it's so wrong
Too wrong
Too wrong to comprehend
What's up?
'Cause here, in my head
I'm thinking
Seeking what's not there
Was it ever there?
It isn't anymore.
Empty.
That is what I feel.
Empty.
Everything's unreal.
In a blur of colours,
Life passes.
In the blink of an eye,
What was there has died.
"Will you come back?" I asked the sky
Like the foolish child I am;
Silence.
No answer.
Silence.
Not a word.
It didn't want to answer back,
So I tried and tried to backtrack
To the days in which I was happy;
But now she's gone, as has a piece of me.

I was having a few main words spinning around in my head whilst writing that. Empty. Gone. Goodbye. Not enough time. Why?

I haven't cried. Not yet anyway. But I feel like I will. Only, I like to be alone when I'm crying, because it's my most vulnerable state and I don't feel like showing people what I'm like when I'm in my most vulnerable state. It's called human pride. It's good to let it all out by crying, because keep it bottled in and you might have a total breakdown in public. Still, pride. Human pride gets in the way of a lot of things. It's the reason behind why we do and don't do certain things publicly. It's peculiar.

It doesn't feel the same. It's been a few hours, but knowing it's a farewell makes everything seem sour. I've done this before. I've said a billion goodbyes. But the older I get, and the closer I become with those people, the more it hurts when they leave. Or when I do. When I will. One day. But it's not always "goodbye". It's also a "see you later" sometimes. Because I will see her later. It just feels weird. Hours, it's been, mere hours, but thinking about it doesn't feel right. There's been other people I've said goodbye to, as I said just then. Really nice, kind, funny, considerate people who don't look down on me because I'm an English nerd or I look weird or my thighs are flabby or I have a weird sneeze. But this friend? With this friend, I laughed at my English nerdiness and both my external and internal weirdness and my own flabby thighs, and sometimes my sneeze too. You know, I even made an inside joke for the thighs, and those crazy girls laughed along with me. I called them the JAZIM! Texas thighs, from the time I started yelling, "I have thighs the size of Texas," which was really quite fun.

When I get back after the holidays, I know my friends will have my back, both my JAZIM! friends and just my everyday classmates, like the nice girls I chat to before or after school, or the guy in my class who said I looked even more Asian than usual wearing glasses (which his friend claimed to be a racist comment, but I just laughed at, because I didn't mind). I'm just another face in this country. Probably represented as a number. I'm just another voice in this world - yet how could I go without posting this?

I have my oldest friend, a girl who surprises me when I least expect it and teaches me new lessons with every passing year. I have my quirky friend, who I haven't known for long, but I knew was cool since the invention of the "ding". I have my refuses-to-stop-laughing friend (the official term in the Iz dictionary for refuses-to-stop-laughing is actually "Meon", "MJR" or "shong"). I love the three of them. Mush, Ding and Shong.

But somebody's missing.