Denial until the last minute

PROLOGUE pt1

23 June 1943

Penthesliea or more known as Penny by her family, was born in 1939 and was raised by her father, James Barnes. To her, he was everything, She loved her dad more than anything and when she found out that he was going off to war she was so devastated. 

She may have only been four but she was a smart girl, she knew that there was fighting going on some where and she knew that people were dying because of it. She didn't want to lose her dad, so she told him that and she cried to him about how she didn't want him to go. 

"Please daddy, I, I don't want you going, Please don't go" she said through sobs and sighs as her father cradled her in his arms.

 He too didn't want to leave, he didn't want to leave his little girl especially because she was so young and couldn't properly protect herself against monsters. Yes, he knew her mother was a goddess but he didn't know which one but did he know that because of what she was, his daughter would always be in danger.

"It'll be okay, I'll always come back to you and never leave you. How about tonight we can stay in and I'll read you you're favourite story." 

He knew how to make her happy. 

Silea considered this "Promise" she said and stuck her pinkie finger out. "Promise" Said Bucky and linked his pinkie with hers. She asked if her Uncle Cartwheels could be there as well.

Uncle Cartwheels was the nick name she had given to Steve Rogers. He had got the nickname after he had tried to entertained her by doing a cartwheel but he failed to do one and instead ended up flat on the ground. At least he had been able to make her laugh.

" Sure that sounds amazing I'll tell him to meet us later" Bucky said.

 He rocked Silea to sleep because she had cried so much it made her exhausted and tried. after she had fallen asleep, he went and placed her in her bed and kissed her forehead and left to go find Steve.

Time skip

Penny Had woken up to find that it was now 4:58pm. she had slept a good 7 hours. She got out of the bed and went to the living room and she had a feeling that her dad had left to go do something so he went to the couch and set there thinking of what to do.

She decided that she would play with some of her dolls while she waited for her dad to come back. She played with her dolls for maybe 2 or more hours, she was starting to get bored so she got up and checked to see what time it was. It was 6:23pm and Bucky still wasn't back. She decided that she would do some drawings. She had tried to draw her and her dad standing together holding hands. She had draw a bunch of other random things for about another hour and when she then ran out of paper so she just started to run around the house laughing and giggling pretending to be being chased by something. After a while she started to get tired out so she hopped onto the couch and fell asleep. 

She had been asleep for a few hours and Bucky had just got home, as he tried to get into the apartment as quietly as possibly but he failed and woke Penny up. Penny woke up and looked straight at Bucky, she could see the lip stick marks on his neck and she smell the alcohol on him. she turned her had to look at the clock, bucky followed her line of sight and saw that it was 11:47pm. It was way past her bed time. 

"What are you still doing up, your meant to be in asleep in bed" He said.

 He had completely forgot about the promise he had made. Penny sat there looking at her dad, he had broken her promise, he had also not brought Uncle Cartwheels either. And to make it worse, he had gone to the bar and made out with some lady and got drunk instead of being with his daughter.

Bucky sighed and went over to go give Penny a hug but when he went to hug her she pushed herself out of his arms and scooted down the couch away from him. He was puzzled, he didn't know why she was behaving like this, she was acting like he had done something wrong. To him he hadn't but to Penny he had done one of the worst things ever.

"what was that for?" He asked her.

She just stared at him with a face of disappointment. Bucky tried to go and hug her again but she just said "NO". She had tears in her eyes at this point. it was meant to be a nice goodbye night, where they could be together and be a family, but he had to stuff it up.

Bucky didn't know why she was crying and why she wouldn't hug her but, he did know he didn't like it. It was his last night before he would have to go to war and his own daughter won't even give him a hug. His face of hurt changed into a face of anger, one that Penny had never seen.

"WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE THIS, I'M GOING OFF TO WAR TOMORROW AND I'M MOST LIKELY NOT GOING TO COME BACK, AND I'M GOING OFF TO PROTECT YOU!!!! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN SAY THANK YOU AND GIVE ME A HUG, INSTEAD YOU JUST GIVE ME DIRTY LOOKS, GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU."

Penny was crying at this point, she started to feel like she had done something wrong, but she hadn't but she still felt like she did. She looked down at her hands feeling like as if she looked at her dad again he would just get even more made.

"you, you promised you would spend the night with me" she said in a small voice.

When Bucky heard what she said, he remembered the promise she had made but instead of thinking to apologise he just got annoyed. When Penny looked up she could see the annoyance on his face, she immediately looked back down.

"Oh, so this is what your talking about. YEAH I WENT TO THE BAR INSTED, SO WHAT SUE ME FOR WANTING TO HAVE SOME FUN, GOD YOU RUINED EVERYTHING, EVER SINCE YOU WERE BORN I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO DO MOST OF THE THINGS I LIKE TO DO!!!!!!"

His yelling scared Penny so she ran to he room and closed the door and ran to her bed to hide herself under the covers. The sheets around her face were wet with her tears, she tried to clam herself down but she could still hear her dad in the living room cursing about how ungrateful she was and the random curse words.

Bucky sighed and fell back onto the couch, he had a massive head ache because of the amount of alcohol he had consumed and his yelling. He sat there, thinking about the events of the night. He could hear his daughter crying in the room over. He felt bad for saying what he said. He didn't even know why he said that stuff, he didn't mean it, he loved Penny, to him his little girl was the best thing that happened to him.  He couldn't regret what he said more than anything in his life. 

{1243 words}

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HII, SO WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE FRIST CHAPATER/PROLOGUE?

I TRIED MY BEST TO MAKE IT SO YOU COULD SEE HOW BUCKY FELT AT THE SAME TIME AS SLIEA

AND I'M NOT MAKING BUCKY INTO A BAD DAD HE WAS JUST DRUNK.

ALSO THIS IS THE MOST I HAVE EVER WRITTEN IN A DAY, SO BE PROUD OF ME.

LOVE, AUTHOR