BROKEN GLASS. TOM KAULITZ

xiv . movie night

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I CAN'T FIGURE OUT WHAT'S STOPPING ME FROM DITCHING Chris, Genevieve, Tom and the others, and going home while they stand in front of the shelf full of junk food at Al's Convenience, trying to decide what snacks to get.

Suddenly, we're a group. It makes me sick. I head over to the magazine rack and try to remember how to breathe and that's where Tom finds me ten minutes later, my eyes closed, snapping my fingers.

Breathe in.

"We've got the food," he says. Out. "Chris and Georg are paying now."

"Okay." In. I open my eyes.

He extends his hand, like for me to take, and I do but my hand is sweating, and I drop my hand from his and it's awkward. That's what happens when you sort of tell someone it's okay if they've kissed you and it's okay if it happens again, but you don't tell them if it's okay to do couply things like hold hands.

I guess I'm starting to care too much. That's why my hands are sweating.

"Okay," I repeat. "Let's go."

"Wait."

"Stop following me." Slam. "I said get away from me!"

I turn my head in the direction of the noise. It takes such an effort, I think I must be dying. I feel like it. I blink slowly, several times, until I can sort of focus on a pair of people silhouetted by the moonlight filtering in through the window blinds.

"Nothing is going on between me and Bianca Davis-,"

"That's not what Priscilla said!"

I close my eyes.

"What? You're taking Priscilla's word for this She's drunk off her ass! When we dragged her in here she was telling us what a beautiful person Genevieve is! I am not fucking Bianca!"

"Oh, really? Because that's not what Bianca told me and she wasn't drunk off her ass when she said it!"

She starts to cry.

"Oh, Jesus, Liv. Don't cry, please..."

"I can't even look at you right now. Get out."

"No, please, Liv — we can figure this out. I'm not leaving this room until we do. Don't do this. Please."

"There's nothing to figure out, Jaden."

"What does that mean?"

Silence.

"I asked you what that meant."

"What do you think it means? I don't want you
here. Get. Out."

All of a sudden I'm being jerked upright. My stomach lurches. I try to tell whichever one of them it is to stop and leave me alone, but I can't move my mouth.