violent delights, bangtan

08. courtyard

"Break you out?" You laugh softly at what Jungkook is asking you to do. It sounds bizarre and stupid, making you believe that it's just a harmless joke. You meet his eyes and see his stone-cold expression; no words are needed for you to finally understand that none of this is a joke at all.

"You're serious?" you ask, raising a brow. Jungkook nods in response, watching carefully as your face changes to express confusion. You still can't fully comprehend what he wants. "Jungkook, you know I can't do that."

"I want you to try." He grabs your hand again, trying to meet your gaze, but you just look straight ahead. You want to help him in any way you can, but this is beyond what you are capable of doing.

"How would I even do that?" you finally meet his eyes and watch him think for a second. "You haven't even thought this through properly. You need to get better, then you'll be allowed out."

"Do you know how long I've been waiting? I'm never going to get better in this place."

"Jungkook, the pills and the doctors are going to help you," you say, your voice softening in an attempt to soothe him. He sighs.

He pauses for a moment, his frown deepening and his eyebrows furrowing as he scans your features. Jungkook is really hoping he can convince you to listen to him and help him, but it's just not working. "You know what, you're right. I'll just stick to the pills and doctors."

He wants to tell you how they don't help at all and never will. It has been years since he arrived at the asylum, and the doctors don't care about him; they just want to get paid. The pills are even worse, at least for him they are.

You smile at his response, once again failing to hear the cold tone in his voice and see how his face drops as soon as you look away.

"Well, I should get going now. Is there anything else you need?"

"Oh yeah, do you know when you could get me new painting supplies?"

Right. You had promised Jungkook that you'd get him more supplies and even paint with him.

"I'll get it as soon as I can, don't worry."

"And also... please don't mention what I said to anybody else. I don't know what I was thinking." He looks down at his hands and fidgets with his nails, appearing vulnerable.

"It's okay, I promise it'll stay between us," you say, raising your pinky finger and locking it with Jungkook's, causing him to smile at your innocent, childlike manner.

You sigh as the door to Jungkook's room shuts behind you. Resting your back against the door and raising your hand to your head, you think about what it must be like for all the patients here. You aren't stupid; you can tell Jungkook isn't going to drop this. For a split second there, you were about to say yes to helping him. But you're not the type of person who likes being relied on.

Getting up from your position by the door, you quickly make your way down the long hall and back to the reception. The day goes by slowly, and you think more time would have passed, but it has only been a couple of hours. The weather outside has worsened; it's more gloomy than ever. Soft sounds of rain falling can be heard, and you want to get home before it starts to get heavy.

You make your way back to the aloof receptionist who is typing away on her computer. Once again, she seems too immersed in her own world to notice you standing in front of her.

"Uhm, excuse me," you call quietly. The receptionist turns slightly, scowling.

"What do you want now?" she asks, annoyance in her tone.