old friend.

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by monkeyruns

by monkeyruns

We haven't spoken in years
But your birthday rolled around
And I wished you.

Oh how I kicked myself afterwards
"Why did I wish you back into my life?"
"He'll despise me for doing so".

But I was met with politeness.
"Thank you" and "we should catch up".

I had mixed feelings about it.
I missed my friend but also,
We had grown apart.
Mostly because you liked me more.
More than a friend.
And I did not reciprocate.

We grew up together.
And I missed your familiarity.
I just know that
It would feel like coming home.

I'm sorry that I didn't reciprocate.
Maybe in time I'd grow to love you.
But I can't see it happening now.

We're too different.
I wouldn't be your perfect match.
We do have the same ethnicity.
But I wouldn't fit in your family
Due to our religions.

When I found out
You liked me romantically
Many, many years ago,
I was caught off guard.
I only ever saw you
As my childhood friend.
But I also understood
Why you felt that way.

When you come back and set a meetup,
I would probably say yes.
Not because I'd take you now.
But because I miss my friend.

I had scrolled through Facebook
And found your wish in 2015
Saying that hopefully
We won't lose contact anymore
And my heart died a little.
Because we did.
And that was why
I sent you that message yesterday.

I hope we'll be in each others' lives
Forevermore.
No matter what, I hope you know
I'll always remember you
And hope you're doing well.