A month passed, then two.
Although, the days never bled together, not like they used to. Amity could distinctly remember the events of every single day. Each one brought a new experience, a new something that she held onto like a lifeline.
Ever since the night in the forest, she'd felt more alive than ever before. It felt ironic, that someone's death had caused her to finally start living her own life.
As each day passed, Amity forgave herself more and more, to the point where she could think about the night in the forest without wanting to curl up into a ball and sob.
That had happened a couple times, but oddly enough, Luz was always the one to comfort her.
As the weeks passed, the real world felt like it was fading away, and the ghost was becoming her reality. The grey's of her surroundings no longer interested Amity, and she became intimately familiar with every color on Luz.
It felt like the world was slowly becoming ghostlike, while Luz gradually became flesh and blood with each passing day.
It was irrational, she knew, nothing was fading away and nothing was becoming more real, but Amity had never been quite rational after Luz's death.
The world around her no longer held any meaning.
~~~
It happened so naturally that it felt like breathing.
It was a Saturday, Amity's new favorite day, and she was reading Good Witch Azura book five aloud to Luz, the ghost no longer possessing the ability to turn pages.
The two had agreed a couple weeks ago that it was the best book in the series so far, both awaiting eagerly the release of book six.
"And so, Azura said to Hecate, "I thought you'd changed, I thought you trusted me now. Turns out I put too much faith in you, yet again. You don't always have to be the villain, Hecate." Azura looked heartbroken and exhausted, and the other witch was no longer smiling. Hecate replied, somewhat sadly. "I told you not to trust me, Azura, but you were as naive as always." With that, she leveled her staff at the other woman's chest."
Luz let out a pained groan, covering her face with her hands and shaking her head.
No, that part always gets me! Why must Hecate betray Azura? The two are so clearly perfect for each other, it hurts my heart.
It's literally the enemies to lovers ship of a lifetime!
Amity smiled, shaking her head ruefully at the ghost.
"I will never understand you."
Hey, don't you dare insult shipping in my presence! I know you think they're as perfect for each other as me.
Don't pretend that I haven't seen your fan art.
Amity felt her cheeks flush, and she closed the book before chucking it at Luz's head. As expected, it passed right through her, but the ghost laughed anyway.
Her laughter was so infectious that Amity felt like laughing as well.
The feeling that rushed through her was so sudden, but so natural at the same time. It came in a wave, nearly knocking her off balance, but also filling her lungs with fresh air simultaneously.
She watched Luz laugh, eyes sparkling with humor and simple pleasure, and the feeling came all at once. Yet, it had been a gradual build to this moment, wave finally cresting and crashing into Amity.
I love you.
As Amity registered the thought, her smile faded and the moment popped like a shining soap bubble.
What's wrong?
It was almost funny how close Luz's voice sounded to the one in her head.
The ghost had stopped laughing, her smile faltering at the way Amity's face suddenly fell. Amity threw off her covers, feeling as if she couldn't breath, she was choking, her head spun-
"I just forgot that I had this really important assignment due-"
Luz stood up, watching Amity grab at straws, trying to find an excuse to get the ghost away.
"-and I need peace and quiet, so maybe you could go downstairs? Please."
The last word came out in a strangled sort of gasp, but Luz failed to notice.
Alright then, we'll finish the chapter when you're done?
"Sure."
Her voice was strained, and she didn't breath until the ghost left and Amity shut the door behind her.
She slid down the wall, tears already springing in her eyes, the weight of everything she'd ever done wrong weighing down on her chest.
Amity felt as if invisible hands were wrapping themselves around her throat, squeezing and leaving purple bruises around her neck. She clawed at her throat in a pointless effort to remove the fingers.
As her head spun and she felt like passing out, the hands let go and she gulped in lungfuls of air, hot tears running down her face.
Of course you'd fall in love with a ghost.
It's such an Amity thing to do.
She let out shuddering sobs, the irrational part of her brain arguing with the cruel but still sane part.
She's not just a ghost, she's Luz! She's everything to me.
Amity knew in her heart that the statement was true.
She's not real.
She knew that statement was also correct.
Amity didn't know which side to believe, and it was splitting her apart, heart tearing with every realization.
Her shuddering sobs grew softer with each passing minute, until all that was left were dry hiccups. Peeling herself off the floor, Amity walked unsteadily towards the bathroom and turned on the sink.
She splashed her face several times with cold water, washing off the tear tracks and washing away the pain.
She doesn't have to know.
Letting down then re-tying her hair, Amity checked her appearance in the mirror to make sure she was presentable. Letting out a long exhale, she made her way downstairs.
Luz sat with her feet up on the kitchen table, staring out the window. Her head turned towards Amity as she approached, slight concern on her features.
Amity tried for a smile.
"We can finish the chapter now."
The ghost smiled and swung her feet to the floor.
Awesome!
She felt the last strings holding her heart together snap.
