Secrets {Staig}

Chapter One

[Stan]
    "Stupid Turd!" Shelly screams as she pushes me outside and slams the door. My parents have left and she wants to have boys over. So I'm supposed to drive into town for the night.
   I rub my back and gather myself to my car, going to the barn and grabbing a couple joints before I do. I'm not even gonna smoke them.... I'm not.
    I drive back into South Park, stopping the car in the parking lot of the Buca De Faggocini and locking it. Beginning to walk around town, the sun hasn't completely set yet, so it's not too dangerous, but it's best I find myself some shelter soon.
    I head to Kyle's first, on foot. I've always preferred walking around town, it's just such short distance. I can get anywhere I need to, and I get a scenic view. Though the views of the townspeople is a bit saddening.
    I get to his door and knock. A breeze rolls past my face that seemingly cuts into it, Sheila opens the door and smiles at me.
    "Well hello, Stanley" she crosses her arms as another breeze rolls through
    "Hi Mrs. Broflovski, is Kyle here?"
    "Oh no she's at Eric's sweetie"
    Cartmans? "Okay, thank you" I turn and begin walking a few houses down. Knocking on Cartmans door once I arrive.
     Liane answers. Instantly I'm disheartened. No way they're hanging out in his room. We never do. What could they be doing without me?
     "Hi Stan" she greets me "are you looking for Eric?"
     "Yeah, is he here?"
    "I'm afraid he took your little friend Kyle to the nuggets game, saved up a whole months allowance just so they could go"
     Huh. Basketball. And they didn't even mention it to me "Thanks Ms. Cartman" I turn and leave. Shelter. Another breeze cuts my face.
       Jimmy is at Clyde's with Tweek. I ultimately decide to try Tolkiens house. But he's not there either. Apparently he's hanging out with Craig. But I can't ask to hang out with him. He's still holding onto this stupid rivalry shit.
     Kyle and I have been over it. Cartman loves to feed into it, and that's what keeps it going, our relationship is built off of pure hostility... but I'd love to be his friend.
    There's just this factor to him. This mysterious aura of asshole. He's said some pretty funny shit, and he's pretty ballsy, the things he's said, the amount of times that guy has been in the principals office because he can't keep his finger to himself. He's pretty smart too, I was warned about him, told he had mental issues his parents didn't care to address,  but he's really smart, kinda in a smartass way, he's got a lot of common sense in him, but he's wise as hell too. I've eavesdropped on him giving advice. It's crazy how a guy who sounds like he's half asleep could put so much genuine concern in his voice for the people he cares about... I wish he cared about me.
    And with that, I find myself at his doorstep, before I can catch myself, I knock, and to my luck, Tolkien answers.
     "Oh Stan, it isn't a good idea to be here"
     "I just gotta get inside, it's late"
     "Go home"
     "I can't I got kicked out"
     "You don't get it. You have to leave."
     "I don't get it, nor do I care, I'll just got sleep at Stark's fuckin pond for the night then, since y'all aren't done being nine" I roll my eyes and turn around, no, I'm not going to sleep at starks pond, I'm just gonna sit there for a bit. The sound of the water moving against the wind has always been relaxing. I've always found it to be the most beautiful part of town.
     When I arrive, it's empty, seemily waiting for me. The moon is out now, shining through the trees, I can't help but stare as I make my way to the bench, almost tripping over a rock as I do.
~One Hour Passes~
      I'm about two joints in, not that I'd admit that to anyone else. I just got done throwing rocks in the pond, and now I've begun laying on the bench. Looking at the stars, the moon shining beside them. Almost too bright. Has the moon always been that bright?
    'Y'know everyone hates you?' I think to myself, looking down and letting out a deep sigh 'Do you even know who you are?' I sit upright and look at the light reflecting agains the water. 'Are you who you wanna be? Or do you just suck?' I think I just suck. I hear people scattering around outside. I really shouldn't stay out here. It's really a pick of the draw what kind of night I'll have, I'll either spend it tagging the town, or getting robbed, and I'd honestly prefer neither. I'm getting kinda tired, and I don't feel like trying extra hard to make my art look presentable.

    "What were you doing at my house Marsh?" I feel something nudge my side, I look over and Craig has just hopped over the bench to sit beside me. He sounds mad, but still softly. "Are you trying to start shit?" That's less soft. More angry.
    I don't know if it was the weed in me, or if it was the way he approached me being so outrageous, but I couldn't help myself "I'm so sick of that shit, Cartman is the only one that cares because he likes fucking with people. I'm not trying to start shit with you. Nor is anyone except Cartman." I look him in the eyes "seriously, I'm just sitting here and you have to come up to me like that?" My head goes back down as I roll my eyes.
    He's silent, for a long time. I see his hand move upwards for a brief moment, and I feel my chest tighten. Did I hurt his feelings? Is it bad that I find it pathetic I did? Because I told him his enemies didn't need to be?
    "I'm over it too." He finally utters, his voice significantly weaker and more emotionless, yet still managing to sound so broken "The only reason I still do it is because Clyde and Tolkien. They want me to be their group leader, and I don't even care about that I-"
    "I could imagine it's nice though." I cut him off "being the leader"
    "Yeah... it is..." he lets out a small laugh, and I can feel something tighten in my chest. Like an instant burst of wanting to hug him. What a cute little giggle.
     "You don't gotta continue that yknow... they're not even here"
     "I just thought it was what you expected"
     "It is but it doesn't have to be." We've met eyes now, and I can see the moonlight shining in his eyes, almost as if it's a sign
      "It doesn't... not when we're alone.." he leans in closer, and I with him. I already know he's gay. The issue is the fact that he's still seeing Tweek. I doubt they're very happy if he's landed himself here, especially with someone he hates. Has he always felt this way? Maybe he has been conflicted inside about how to act socially. That would make sense with all those middle fingers he's throwing out, maybe he's elementary school flirting... whatever it is we're inches away from each others lips, whispering idiotic nothings back and forth to one another. His breath against my face is the warmest I've felt all night.