3rd pov
Our story begins in a tavern, where we see pike, vax, vex, y/n, keyleth and grog having a drinking contest while percy watches while having a glass of wine
Audience: Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!!!
Y/n removes the mug from his mouth and slams it onto the table
Y/n: HAHAHA! I've been blessed with a strong stomach this night!!!
Percy: Y/n wins....again
Vax: Oh fuck me. why do we always play drinking games with a god of all people?
Vex: Because it's the fastest way to get drunk, obviously
Keyleth: (absolutely hammerd) W-who's drunk? N-not me I'm g-great! I-I think we should g-go to another "gag" another ba- "blegh"
Keyleth looks away and begins to throw up...lovely
Pike: Didn't you only have one ale? (Looks at the mess and gags) oh (pats her chest) so junky
After Keyleth finally stops throwing up some dicknose steps in it
Dicknose: Agh, watch it bitch!
He pushes Keyleth away and walks to his table, grog and y/n stand up and look at the asshole
Grog and y/n: Hey you watch it dicknose/arsewipe!!!
Pike: Easy guys, we don't waste our time on talking asshole's remember?
Grog and y/n: Hm/very well
Grog and y/n sit back down as vex raises her mug up
Vex: Oi! Tavernkeep! Another round for vox machina! the greatest band of mercenaries in all the realms!
Y/n: I'll drink to that!
Dicknose: (laughs) The greatest? I heard you couldn't save a calf from a burning farm!
His team laughs at the statement
Dicknose: What a fucking joke!
Vax gets up from his seat and stabs his dagger into the table
Vax: Let's keep things civil, friend. We're not looking for trouble
Dicknose: (walks up to vax and grabs him) Oh I bet you ain't, everyone knows you're a bunch of pathetic losers, who can't get a fucking job! (looks at y/n) well maybe not him (looks back at vax) look at your scrawny ass, too weak to tickle your on pickle
Vax: (puts his hand on his arm) Are you offering to help?
Dicknose: Yeahhhh (realisation kicks in) uh-no I uh-fuck you!
Vax: Aw, I was only offering you to give me a hand!
Vax holds out the basterd's arm as grog chops his hand off, he then backs up and falls onto the counter behind him
Grog: Ya know vax, I think he's willing (looks at the hand) ooh, can I keep this?
Y/n: (walks up beside grog) grog put the hand down, you don't know where it's been
Dicknose: (groans) Don't just stand there gawking louts, kill'em!
BARFIGHT!!!!!!
Y/n then tackles the orc into a wall and starts punching him while everyone else dukes it out
The orc manages to catch one of y/n's fists
Dicknose: So I was right, you are strong, tell you what, why don't you ditch the losers and come join me crew?
YOU ARE READING
The legend of vox machina: son of thunder
ФэнтезиThor the god of thunder is dead... murdered by the herald's of ragnarok, the goroth twins y/n thorson, the eldest son of thor sets out into the world to hunt down these god killers to not only prevent ragnarok but to also to avenge the death of you...
