Flowers, Clouds, and Everything in Between

96

[ MIYA'S LETTERS FOR ALDRINE ]

December 20xx

Los Angeles

For Aldrine,

I have got strong hope that you will get to read this. I am guessing it's Christmas Eve already. Merry Christmas, Drine.

Alam kong hindi ko dapat to ginagawa. Alam ko rin na sinabi ko sayong ayaw ko na.

I apologize for everything. I am sorry for having to be the person who needs you the most, no matter how much I refuse.

From all my heart's content, I desperately need you to see me. More than ever.

Sincerely,
Miya

Ps. Kahit sulat lang pabalik. Baka sakali lang na malaman ko kung anong petsa na.

* * *

January 1, 20xx

Los Angeles

For Aldrine,

Happy New Year. Sigurado na ako, may fireworks kasi sa labas ng bintana kanina.

I'm counting days. I have no idea kung hanggang kailan ba naipapadala yung sulat but just to make sure, and while I still can, I'll write to you.

In the mean time, I'm going to wait. And while I wait, I will recall all our memories in my head. I am going to grab my camcorder and press playback, and our moments will come to life.

And I'm going to imagine you wearing my necklace, the dog tag dangling from your chest, as if my thoughts are of you, walking the grounds of the Earth with your heart bearing my name on it.

I'm going to think about everything you are. I have to keep myself up on the surface.

Please. Please. Please. Please. Please, Drine. Gusto na kitang makita. I don't want to live the rest of my days grieving for what we could have become.

Ganito pala pag malayo sayo. Hindi ko pala talaga kaya.

Sincerely,
Miya

* * *

January 14, 20xx

Los Angeles

For Aldrine,

I'm starting to be afraid by now.

Afraid that my longing, no matter how intense, can't keep my memories of you. I'm afraid that no matter how long I have to wait, you won't come.

My prior letters must have had awful penmanship. I'm sorry. Nagmamadali akong magsulat, nanginginig pa ang kamay ko. This time, I'm making it more readable. So that this time, you'll be able to answer.