heroine ;;kellic

13;; you got me swimming

My eyes flicker open to bright, sterile lights. I blink a couple of times, trying to adjust from the darkness of sleep to the lightness of the room. I feel... really exhausted. I try to sit up but I realize that I actually can't. I'm attached to five thousand different wires, I have a tube down my throat, and I have an IV in each arm. Why am I in a hospital?

I groan out, hoping to catch the attention of some passerby. If I could move, I'd rip this tube out of my throat. It's actually incredibly uncomfortable. I recognize it was there for a reason, but I was breathing just fine at the moment. Maybe a little too fine. My breaths were fast-paced and I think I was panicking.

"Kellin, calm down."

I turn my gaze to the left and see a familiar face. A couple familiar faces, actually. Sitting on the bedside chair is Justin, with Gabe and Jesse standing behind him. In the very back corner of the room, sleeping on a couch, is Vic. I raise my eyebrows at them.

"I'll go get the nurse," Gabe says, walking out the room. Jesse shrugs and follows him. I didn't know them that well, so it was... kind of awkward that they were here. Did they care about me? I guess they had to, if they were here, but maybe they were here as support for Justin. Justin, who I was really surprised was here. I really thought he hated me now.

"I'm so glad you're safe," Justin says, tears prickling his eyes. He lets one slide down his cheek before wiping it away. "Oh God, you had no idea how scared I was when Vic called me."

I just look at him. There's not really much else I can do. I can't speak with this tube in my mouth. I feel really bad. I don't know what I did but I must've done something. Did I get hit by a car? Did I... Did I try to kill myself? I didn't think I'd had the guts to do it, if I did. What the hell did I do?

Gabe and Jesse return with the nurse, who says that she's happy to see me awake. Was I in a coma? I'm so confused.

"Did you want us to remove the breathing tube, Mr. Quinn?" she asks. I grunt, hoping that was a suitable "yes." I try nodding my head but it's not really working out for me.

She smiles softly at me and takes out the tube in a swift motion. The feeling was weird and I was glad it was over quickly.

"I'll leave you to your friends, the doctor will see you in a little while," she tells me as she leaves, throwing the tube into one of those medical waste bins.

"What—" I try to speak but my throat hurts. It is so dry. My voice is hoarse. "—did I—"

"Stop," Justin says, resting his hand on my shoulder. "You're gonna hurt yourself."

I do what he says and stop trying to speak. Clearly, that was too much for me to handle right now. He glances over at Gabe and Jesse and they leave the room, sitting in the chairs outside. I see them through the window, looking at each other. Gabe says something to Jesse, but I can't hear him.

"You, uh... You've been out for a couple of days," Justin starts. He looks tired, more tired than Vic does. They both have bags under their eyes. The difference, Justin looks like he hasn't slept at all the last few days, whereas Vic is sleeping just fine on the couch.

I look at Justin in confusion. He takes a deep breath before continuing.

"Vic called me, uh... You overdosed. You don't have to tell me if it was on purpose or not. He called me, he told me he found you while you were still awake but you were cold, you weren't really breathing, and your fingers were turning blue," he says. He is trying really hard to keep it together. "Kellin, you had no idea how worried I am about you. I can't keep doing this, I thought you might realize yourself you need help but I don't want to wait until it's too late. They had to give you Narcan twice! Twice, Kellin!"