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The meeting at Pamoja was being held informally in one of their courtyards. Nurse Belinda and Nurse Grant were seated with Alex Mujulizi around an outdoor stone table overlooking a pond and a cluster of green plants.
I had no idea whether or not sitting in on meetings was a part of Alex's job description here, but his presence made me nervous. I wondered if he had terrifying news about my grandmother's health. He was a surgeon. What if he'd found something terribly wrong when he ran all his tests? Would she need surgery? A transplant?
I figured I wouldn't find out if I didn't actually go over and sit down with them. I schooled a smile onto my face and smoothed out invisible creases from the orange, black and white ankara dress I had on before revealing myself from the corner I'd hidden in to compose myself.
"Good morning," I greeted when I got to the table, receiving smiles and greetings from everyone seated.
"Ms. Cheyenne, as you know, we have some concerns about your grandmother's condition." Nurse Grant said with pursed lips and worried eyes. He was the one who'd pulled me away from my grandmother when she struck me last week.
"As you know, she's getting worse day by day," he said with pity in his eyes.
"How was she during the week?" I asked. Since the day I brought her here, I'd never been away from her for that long. I'd believed that staying away would leave her feeling like she'd been abandoned, but the silence that followed my question suggested something else.
"She was better, wasn't she?" I said when no one spoke up.
Nurse Grant nodded sadly and began to speak again, "We had a neurologist come in who confirmed that she's been under a lot of stress lately. Unfortunately, as we ran more tests, it became clear that she mostly experiences a heightened level of stress when you visit."
"Just my luck." I said under my breath and took my eyes off everyone, fighting not to fall apart in their presence.
"Of course, we understand that you cannot help the fact that you remind her of your mother, but we cannot ignore what it's doing to her, either." Nurse Grant added.
"Or what it's doing to you." Alex spoke for the first time since he greeted me. There was a hint of protectiveness in his voice that surprised me. I looked up to find him staring at me, his pretty eyes sympathetic and determined.
I took my eyes off him to avoid squirming under his gaze and looked instead at Nurse Brenda, the woman who'd once assured me that coming in daily would help my grandmother feel less lonely. She had a solemn look on her face, but also determination. "I know, Cheyenne. You must feel like we're severing the bond you have with her, but trust me when I say this is as much for you as it is for her. You're under a lot of emotional strain too, coming in here and being constantly yelled at, or like last week, attacked."
"She didn't mean anything by that. She's just sick." I said in a small voice I barely recognised.
"Of course, dear. No one is suggesting that she meant to hurt you. But we're acknowledging that you were hurt and we're trying to do something about it. We all made a vow to help people to our best ability and to cause as little damage as possible."
