Precious mistakes *T.Clarkson*

"I Don't Want It"

Maeve knew how she was still so unsure on what to do with the baby. She knew that she was torn on keeping it. Or giving it up for adoption.

She was still young. And she had never wanted kids. But now she was pregnant, things had changed. And she was ever so conflicted. She just felt as though she needed advice.

Maeve had no idea how to even go about things. She felt lonely. She was thankful that Tom had said he was going to be there for her. But ultimately, she knew he would want to keep the baby.

And Maeve wasn't so sure she could do it. She just needed to figure it all out. Before it got too much for her.

She had been talking to Esmè about all that she had been through. But she knew they were completely different situations. Esmè had been unwell when she gave her baby away. Maeve had slept with her English teacher.

While it was hard, part of her had been thinking what if. What if she kept the baby. Would she even be a good mum? Or would she fail at it.

These were all questions she needed to answer. And somehow she didn't think it would be easy to get them answered.

All she knew was that things were complicated. And she just had to somehow figure it all. But she wasn't sure how.

Morning came and she walked into the kitchen. She sat Bella and sat with her. "Where's mummy?" She asked.

Bella giggled. "Mine mummy is makings my bed. Gandma wents to work," she told her.

Maeve nodded. She looked to her and smiled. She knew how she had a close bond with Bella. She had helped look after her when Esmè had left.

Esmè walked into the kitchen and smiled. "Oh hey. You want some pancakes?" She asked.

Maeve shook her head. She smiled. "I'm not really hungry. I'll have some orange juice," she said.

***
Maeve was sitting in the common room when she got to school. Knowing how she didn't want to deal with people just yet. She sighed as she looked to see her mum walking in. "Hey. You okay?" She asked.

Maeve nodded as Maggie sat down. She sighed. "You didn't eat this morning. Why?"

Maeve rolled her eyes. "I just wasn't hungry."

"You need to keep your strength up for the baby."

"Baby! Baby! Baby! That's all anyone seems to talk about! This baby! I'm fed up of it. I don't want the thing!" She yelled.

She knew how things were getting too much for her. And she couldn't cope at all. She felt like she couldn't do it. She couldn't be a mum.

Maggie looked to her. She frowned. "How can you say you don't want that baby? Do you know how lucky you are?"

"I don't feel lucky."

***
Tom saw Maeve walking by. He left his classroom and smiled to her. "Hey. Come here," he said as he took her into his classroom. "I heard about your meltdown in the common room. Are you okay?"

Maeve shrugged. "I don't know. I don't know what I am anymore. I just... I don't know. I can't cope with this anymore," she said.

Tom took her hand. He smiled. "You're not alone. You know that?"

"Thanks."

But Maeve had no idea how her battle with herself was about to get a whole lot worse.