The Exit - Oscar Piastri FF

22. - Explanations

Oscar, Logan and I ended up being sat in my driver's room for an hour, talking about everything that happened that day. I asked a lot of questions and they seemed to answer me honestly. Essentially, Oscar had woken up in the middle of the night to a message on my phone from Max. It said that he was sorry about the episode at the restaurant and that he wished he could go back in time to when we were in London for the funeral, so he could do it all over, and I would've still been his. His words, not mine. Oscar saw this and started second-guessing if what he was doing was alright and if what he had said was correct. He worried, that if that had been the case, if we would have ever gotten to the point we were back then, or if I would have been with Max still, and potentially forever. He got in his own head, which is something I had never seen happen to him before.

He got out of bed in the middle of the night and decided to keep a low profile that day to clear his thoughts. He didn't want to talk, in case there was a chance that it was true and that that would mess with his results, so he wanted to have that talk with me that night instead. He didn't want me to worry, so he acted as if he hadn't seen my message, and tried to avoid me the whole day to not break down in the middle of the day. 

He had spoken to Logan about it, and he had tried to make it clear that what he had done wasn't the way to go about it. Oscar knew that, but he didn't know what else to do, he couldn't face me at that point, so he asked Logan to just play along for that one day, saying it would be best that way. 

I took a deep breath after hearing the whole story, and I didn't know exactly what to say. I wasn't happy with the way Oscar had handled the situation, especially since we had spent the night together that night. "Say something..." Oscar begged, as I had been silent for a while, and hadn't looked at them once since they had stopped talking. "I don't know what to say, Oscar..." I admitted, and he went over to sit down beside me, placing a hand on my knee. "I know I handled everything horribly, but I was feeling so insecure about everything, and I just didn't know what to do... I thought that maybe when you saw that text, or if Max said something that day, you would've wanted to get back together with him..." He explained, and I knitted my eyebrows together in a frown.

"I had already told you back then, that nothing he could say or do would make me give him another chance. You said you trusted me, but that was just a lie," I explained back, lifting my head up to look at him. "I'm sorry, Con... I wanted to believe you, I really did... And then after it all went down, I regretted it so much, 'cause I knew I had lost you again, and that's the last thing I ever wanted to happen..." He confessed, but I shook my head. "Don't you see this is exactly what happened last time as well? It's a different scenario, but evidently, it's exactly the same..." I asked, and he looked at me confused. "You don't trust me enough to just be honest and tell me how you feel, what you think... That's what happened almost two years ago, and that's what has happened now again. Why don't you trust me?" I asked, tears in my eyes, as I just didn't understand it. How come I could tell him anything, hell, I could barely hold in the truth, and he didn't trust me enough to tell his? "I thought we were best friends," I thought out loud and saw it in his face how it broke him and tears started rolling down his cheeks. 

"We are best friends!" He tried, but I shook my head. "People trust their best friend and tell them everything,-" I tried to explain, but he cut me off, "Not when they're in love with them!" He exclaimed, and I could tell it came straight from the heart. I stayed silent and just sat there, staring at Oscar, who was doing exactly the same. "You still could've..." I said, but it only came out as a whisper. I felt him squeeze my knee gently whilst wiping the tears from his face. "I know that I could... But I was so scared... Whenever it comes to my feelings for you, I just can't think clearly..." He poured his heart out, and I finally felt like I could see him the same way again. The hurt slowly washed away, and I knew I had to forgive him. I took a deep breath and a small, exhausted smile found its way to my lips. "I'm really sorry, Con... Please forgive me," He begged, and I nodded my head softly, then pulled him into a hug. 

"Please kiss already, I'll close my eyes," Logan spoke from the other end of the small room, and then put his palm over his eyes, making us both let out a small laugh.