Somebody Does Love

She's Gone

Dearest Yoongi,

Initially, I was fine with our arrangement because I believed our love could overcome any obstacle. Unfortunately, I was wrong. I do not believe my feelings for you are not strong enough to overcome all odds. My father was right; our future is uncertain.

Please do not look for me. Have a good life.

Hannah

I read the letter I found on Hannah's bedside table. Every word sliced me into tiny pieces. I assumed we felt the same way for each other. How could she just walk away from me like that? After all that we have gone through.Those years, those memories, were so insignificant to her that she dismissed them casually.

Hannah's father returned in the morning, after she had gone. I handed him the letter. He nodded in approval. He seemed pleased with his daughter's decision to leave me. "Very well," he said, standing up, "have a good life, Min Yoongi." I know my daughter would not let me down."

I showed no emotions. I refuse to give him the satisfaction of seeing how broken I am inside. I did not even acknowledge him, which surprised him somewhat.

******

My phone rang, so I stood up to take it from the table. It was Jungkook.

"Suga hyung, Jin hyung asked me to call you to remind of our get together later."

"Tell him I will be there."

*****

"Yoongi! How are you,bro?"J-hope welcomed me with a hug and a pat on the back.

"Hey man!"I said back.

All of them came and welcomed me warmly. I was the last one to arrived.

We are at Jin hyung's place. Their enthusiasm and laughter were contagious.

"Hey, do you remember when Hannah-" J-hope paused as he realization dawned on him. Silence engulfed them. 

I took a slow sip of the wine, allowing it to burn its way down my throat. "I saw Hannah."I spoke quietly. 

"What? Where?"Jimin inquired urgently. 

I was at a newly opened store for the clothing brand I was endorsing. They arranged a fan meet and greet for me. In the midst of an interview, I noticed a familiar face staring at me from one corner. "Hannah!" my thoughts exclaimed.Our gazes locked, and time stood still, just like the first time we met. My heart nearly leaped out of my chest. I could not stop the smile on my face.

She averted her gaze. Her expression brightened, and I had to follow her line of sight. I saw a man approaching her, holding a small girl in his arms. I overheard the little girl say "momma."

I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach. The pain that gripped my heart nearly took my breath away.

I am not even sure how the event concluded. Everything appears blurry and slow.

"I believe she is married now."I told them quietly, and before I could stop myself, the tears that I had been holding back for so long rolled down my cheeks. It is similar to the opening of a dam. I broke down.

My brothers got up from their seats and came to hug me.

I am not sure how I arrived home. Jin hyung invited me to stay with him, but I declined and went home.

I need to sleep in the bed Hannah and I used to share. I grabbed her pillow and burrowed my face into it. When I miss her terribly, I use her shampoo. It's a new bottle. I looked around all of the stores for the same thing until someone told me it was personalized. I got in touch with the shop and ordered a box. That is how I was able to move forward for nearly two years.

Every morning, when I wake up, I have to condition myself before leaving for work. I need to concentrate my efforts on the task at hand. But at the end of each day, I return home to find emptiness. 

I miss her a lot. 

They could have had that little girl. If only she believed him. If only she had trusted him. I wish she had stayed. Why didn't she give me the opportunity to fight for us instead of simply ending our relationship? 

I would have abandoned everything if she had asked me to flee. Nothing means more to me than being with her.

I recalled how she smiled at her family. Her small family. She used to give me that kind of smile. I used to be the reason her face brightened. It now belongs to someone else.  

"Some good things never last," as the old saying goes. Perhaps they are correct.

Hannah and I had the best. We have been through both good and bad times. We had some silly moments and conversations. We spent the nights making love after a fight. All of these made wonderful memories.

They said we met people by fate rather than chance, and I believed them. That if something is meant to be, it will happen. I kept it for one and a half years. I imagined myself meeting and speaking with her again. I imagined myself reuniting with her and continuing where we had left off. Even if her father disagrees, as long as she stays with me, everything will be fine. However, that is no longer the case. She now has her own family, and while she may have been happy, my world felt apart that day.

Is it finally time to let her go? Is it time to move on and accept that Hannah was not the right person for me? She was like a beautiful dream that I had to awaken from.

I hope to be able to speak with or see her again someday and tell her how much I love her. I hope one day I will be able to hold her one more time.

Even if it's for one last time.

"Hannah," I said quietly in the darkness.