Under Suppression

Real Talk

Alycia's POV

I've seen this type of mindset before.

Y/n has a habit of being really hard on herself already, but it's reached a whole other level in the last couple weeks. I've always admired how strong she was, and how no matter how many times she was knocked down, she'd get right back up.

But people can only be so strong so long before it takes a toll on you.

I finished labeling Y/n's bloodwork, knowing I had a little time before she came back from her chest X-ray, and turned when I heard the ambulance doors opening.

Joel rushed inside, scanning the ER before his eyes fell on me, letting out a sigh of relief that she wasn't in the rescus bay.

"How is she?"

"Her sats are looking good, considering she's in for smoke inhalation, but her heart rate's pretty elevated, so when she gets back from the X-ray, I'm gonna run some fluids."

"Kid cannot catch a fucking break," he sighed, wiping at his eyes. I could tell he was holding back a few tears, which most would think was pretty normal since someone they were so close to went down in a fire, but in this situation, it was different.

I could sense his own stress building in a way that was similar to mine. A growing concern that maybe there was something deeper going on here.

"You're worried about her," I prompted, and he glanced up with a tight lipped smile.

"Something's not right, and I don't mean the accidents... that's actually pretty normal.." we both let out a small chuckle, both of us needing a good laugh after all of this. "I mean like.. mentally. She's been kicking herself over the smallest things, staring off at the station, even her sense of humor's died down."

"Yeah, I've noticed the same. I'm gonna try to talk to her about it when she gets back to her room actually.."

"Good luck with that," Joel rolled his eyes, and I gave him a confused look. "I tried asking her if she was mentally okay and she damn near shattered my rib cage."

"Let me get this straight," I shook my head into my hand, "you asked her if she was 'mentally okay' and you're surprised that it may have come off offensive."

He squinted his eyes in thought, "yeah, I probably could have worded that better."

"It's fine, just keep an eye on her for me.. We're gonna talk in a second, but please just make sure she doesn't do anything stupid when I'm not there."

Joel slowly nodded his head, biting the inside of his cheek to hide his own worry and I gave him a sad smile before pulling him into a small embrace. "Take care of her for me."

"You know I will."

Y/n's POV

"I'm always tachycardic, that's normal for me."

"It's at 143, you're literally almost in SVT."

I let out a groan, not getting anywhere with the ER doctor that was insisting to keep me for observation. Don't get me wrong, I understand why they're so worried, it's a liability thing. They don't wanna be the people to send a first responder home when there's a risk their condition could worsen after discharge...