The demons that hold me...

Bingo stays home with Stan

Bingo

Stan has become very overprotective of me over the last few days, I understand he wants me to heal, but I also need to learn to walk with my crutches.

"Stan! I can walk alone!" I told him, "I just want to help you Bingo..." He said, a bit down.

"Stan... Why do you keep being so protective?" I asked, trying not to sound mean. "Because I just can't shake the fact that you're hurt bc of me!" Stan blurted out.

"Stan... We've been through this..." Mum had walked in and started talking to Stan, "You know it wasn't your fault, accidents happen." Mum told him.

"Is that why I'm here?" Stan said blatantly. What? What did Stan mean by that?

Stan took himself to his room and closed the door, mum and I still downstairs stunned at Stans response.

"Stan! Please come out!" I had mustered enough strength to get up the stairs, and I was now by his door.

"Please Bingo... I don't wanna hurt you anymore, please stay away."

I can't believe it, Stan really thinks he hurt me... Then I'll show him what hurts me!

"Stan! What hurts me the most is you being in pain! Please come out!" I said nearly crying now. Stan opened the door, as he saw me crying, he picked me up again.

"I'm sorry Bingo, I just..." Stan began, but I stopped him.

"Stan, I understand your concern, but please also understand that you are my big brother, and that I will love you regardless." I told him, he began to cry a bit, I wiped his tears away.

"Leave those dead thoughts behind Stan... They don't mean anything anymore" Dad told Stan, he had heard our talk.

"Dead?" Stan asked, "Then why do they still control me...?" Stan asked.

"Stan, it's because you don't see what you have, and you won't if you keep letting yourself get pulled into darkness." Mum said, "I'm sorry Stanny, please don't be sad anymore..." I hugged him.

Stan

Bingo held onto me stronger than ever, did she understand me? Did she really understand what I was going through? I love you, you little red heeler.

"Stanny?" Bingo asked, "Why are you still sad?" She cocked her head to the side, it made me laugh under my breath, she was too damn cute.

"I'm not Bingo... I'm just... I don't know." I said, giving them an unsure answer of my wellbeing. Bingo didn't like this and made it her mission to cheer me up.

"Darky clouds! You let go of my brother!" Bingo said flailing her arms around my head. "Replace by thoughts about Bluey and me!" She said in a commanding voice, I laughed as she did this.

"Oh Bingo, you always know how to help." I said, in reality, I was still hurting, but Bingo needed me to be happy, so I played it off.

When Bluey returned home, her and Bingo decided to play some games such as "I spy", I stayed in the kitchen working on schoolwork, as I hadn't done mine for the day yet.

"Stan honey..." Mum sat down next to me, she handed me a PB&J and kept on, "If at anytime you want to talk, I'm here okay?" She told me.

"I know mum, I'm just in pain, I love you guys, really I do, it just hurts..." I said to her, she hugged me and kissed my forehead. "If you don't want to do your schoolwork for the night you can do it tomorrow, okay?" She told me. I obliged and put up my work, ready to start it again tomorrow morning.

The rest of the day went pretty smooth, it was just games upon games with Bluey and Bingo, they seemed to enjoy spending time with me, I loved my sisters, and I always will.