God of Desire: RemiXAriella

Chapter 15- ARIELLA/REMI

This chapter is bit lengthy an I hope it is not borning

______________ARIELLA POV______________

He is once again sleeping without a shirt on. I sit on the ground, observing him as he shifts his face in his sleep.
Why, Remington Astor? Why do you bring both chaos and peace into my life? You claim that I am chaos to you, but what about yourself?
I gently brush his messy hair away from his face, allowing me to see his features clearly. I never get tired of gazing him. Suddenly, he opened his eyes and met my gaze. I peer deeply into his eyes, trying to uncover the demons he hides within himself. It hits me like a truck - he is half awake, he will wake up anytime soon. He blinks his eyes, and I quickly move away from him, exiting through his window. I leave before he has a chance to see me. With a smile on my face, I enter my home and remove my mask. I narrowly escaped being caught by him, and today I didn't even need to use chloroform. What if I had been caught? Would he push me away? I am doing this because he pushed me away, and I have no regrets. I take out my phone and check the schedule for the upcoming term exams. Today is Sunday, which means there are no classes. Tomorrow is a practice test, followed by the start of the term exams. He is hosting a party tonight, but I have no desire to attend. I have no reason to go, and no one has invited me. Not that I need an invitation. I can simply barge in and do as I please, and I'm certain no one would complain. I retrieve my journal and began writing to Sophi once again. She is standing beside me, smiling, and I offer her a small smile in return. Tomorrow is the day she left. Annie calls her a star because she believes she has become one, just like her parents. I wonder where she disappears to when everyone else is around. I can't blame her, though, because I know she hates me when I'm with others.

Shoot, sometimes I hate my imagination.

Mom's smile crashed my mind and I realise it now, mom has never smiled because of me, She smiles infront of me of course, but never due to me.

Mom and dad tells me I am unique, Why? because unlike Ces, Glyn or My pretty pink sister, I am not interested in parties or roaming around.
Ava is a social butterfly a complete pack of cheer and happiness, Ava and Rem are same aesthetics but different font if thats what I could put it into.

Ces likes to read but I think she likes reading fiction and I prefer reading both fiction and non fiction specially the ones which has dark psychology content. I once made fun of Ces saying her books are boring and she said she reads because she never experienced those things like the ones in book and I read because I dont want to be here, everything suffocates me except for Rem and books.

Glyn is well, I cant put it in words, she always finds as way to keep her distance from Lan, and him always protecting her from back and helping her not letting her know because she is scared of him yet she somehow ended up falling for a person like Killian The Red guy Carson.Who is like Lan too. Okay to be honest nothing and no one are comparable to my brothers who never saw me as if I need therapy or need to see a shrink because of my nightmares or sudden changes.

I ignore my thoughts and keep looking at the screen of my laptop

I look at the picture of my grandma and it feels like we both are staring deep inside eachother, I got this picture from news papers. Dad has no pictures of her.
What made dad hate you grandma?
Is it because you caused somone to die like I did to Sophi? Will dad eventually hate me too?
I wont consider her dead, I dont want too. She is here is what matters.

HELEN NASH, WHO ARE YOU?
Dad avoids speaking about you as if he despises it and mom looks at me with fear in her eyes when ever I say I love writing and I am damn sure it has to be something related to you.

And look at me, I write to Sophi in day times, when others prefer to write at night. Were you like this too? Do you prefer writing when alone and no noises are present?
I keep staring at her then shut the laptop.
Store room, her last two books must be in store room. I am sure of it, Dad might have kept it in there or hide it in there.